Holy Crap - I met Neil Gaiman!

We are very excited

Kayso, on June 21, I turned 30. The Beau threw me a party - there was punch and pie - and my Florida parents surprised me : it was awesome. But, the day before something even more awesome happened: The Beau drove me like 5 hours to Saratoga Springs so we could see Neil Gaiman speak. That's right, beyotches...I met Neil Gaiman. We are totally best friends now.  Here's how it went down:

Neil's (Because we are close personal friends now I'm going to refer to him as Neil - because we are clearly on a first name basis. Deal with it.)Anyway, Neil's new book The Ocean at the End of the Lane just came out. He was doing his "last" book signing tour, and one of the stops was in Saratoga Springs, hosted by Northshire Books. Neil came out and was interviewed by Joe Donahue of the Book Show - but I'm not sure if it aired yet.
Neil talked about the new book and his inspiration for it. He talked about how he was writing it for his wife, Amanda Palmer, when she was away and he missed her. He hadn't planned on it being a novel, but it just kept growing. This was really interesting to hear, because just maybe a day or two before, I'd read Amanda's take on the book. Her version is slightly more personal and emotional, which is cool. Kind of neat to hear them both talk about it from their own point of view.

Cooler than you

  Then Neil read a selection from his book. Very cool to hear him read it; he's a great audiobook reader but in person he was awesome. He also read (because Donahue happened to have a ARC copy of the book) a selection from Fortunately, the Milk his next children's book coming out in September. That was cute and funny, and I can't wait to get that as well.

After that he talked a little more candidly about why it's his last tour: so get this, there were 1500 people in Saratoga to hear him speak, and I would guess that about half or more stayed and waited in line to get their books personally signed. That's a butt load of signing. We waited in line for about 3 hours, and we were not the last people. Imagine signing books and trying to be cheerful to fawning strangers for upwards of 4 hours. How exhausting! Gaiman said that he loves it, but it's too much to do such large events, so he plans on doing more ninja signings in the future - like Twittery flash-mob type things. But he also said he loves reading to an audience so he won't stop doing that.

So back to the signing part, like I said, we waited a long time. We talked with a guy who is planning on taking a road trip based on Gaiman's novel American Gods. We saw lots of cool t-shirts. We saw Neil sign a ukelele. Neil was signing in sort of an assembly line and you could tell that he was tired, but that he was trying to talk to everyone at least a little. There were like 6 employees laying out the books and pushing them to him. There was a lady who was wrangling different colored sharpies. It was intense. Then it was my turn. I was all nervous, because I wanted to say something cool, but I'm usually a fangirl dork and I end up sounding like a herb. But he was cool and smiled at me and I told him I put his quotes up in my library all the time and he goes: "You're a librarian? I love librarians! They're my people!" and he cheered for librarians a little. I swooned and was all: "We love you too!" So now Neil and Amanda and I are all married and living happily ever after. Or not, but either way, I got my book signed and it was awesome :-)

Yes, he signed everyone's with a heart, but ours was obviously a love connection...

               

Me looking 12, Neil smiling at my sparkling wit, and the Sharpie wrangler

           My book review of Ocean at the End of the Lane will be coming soon. For other Gaiman reviews by me, go here.      For Neil's website, go here. For his Twitter, go here.                     

My name is bee, and I'm a Constant Reader

Kayso, when I was about 11 or so, I started stealing my sister's Stephen King books off of her shelf and reading them in frantic, stolen snatches. I didn't understand a lot of what I was reading, probably, and I think it began as me looking for another book like Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. Boy, did I find ever so much more than that. I don't know when I started to get it, when I became what King calls a "constant reader," but every summer from the time I was 13 til the time I was in my 20's I reread IT. I still vividly remember the first time reading a book gave me honest to Jesus, actual chills. I was laying around on a hot summer day reading instead of being outside making friends, and I was reading Pet Sematary. I think one of the best books about writing is King's On Writing. Speaking of his writing advice, please enjoy these 20 quotes (you know I love quotes too!).

True Story

Anyway, I'm telling you this because this summer there's a lot to look forward to as a King fan. Under the Dome is gonna be a tv show, which I sincerely hope doesn't suck.
Also, he's got a new book: Joyland. This one is from the Hard Case Crime publishers and is supposed to be a good pulpy old-school creeper - review coming some time this summer, I'm sure.

Oh, and by the freaking way - he has a musical!? (We'll talk about my need for an interobang key another time) Yeah... you heard that right, and yeah, it's making my 15 year old cast geek self all aflutter. Seriously, kids, I love some musically goodness. (I am like freaking Florence + Motley Crue + Idina Menzel in my car/shower.) Anyway, he cowrote this with John Cougar Mellencamp (yeah, I know he dropped the "Cougar" but a heart doesn't forget, John) And you can check it out/gleek out over it here.

Anywho - King was recently on the Today Show talking about the new book and musical and his general awesomeness. He also gives recommendations for summer - which include his sons' works. I haven't read any Owen King yet, but I am reading Nos4a2u right now and it will be my next review. (You can read my review of Hill's Heart Shaped Box here).
Enjoy the video here:

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

 

So, that's all happening. Also, what the hell, here's a picture of me in my "MidWorld Lanes" t-shirt - a reference to the Dark Tower series.

Oh! And when you have a pal who's a photoshop god, you occasionally get things in your inbox like this, unbidden, and awesome (Thanks JK!):

So, yeah, I know I seem a little Annie Wilkes right now, but you know, I'm just an enthusiastic kinda gal.

Book Review: The Fault in Our Stars

• Reading level: Ages 14 and up
  
• Hardcover: 336 pages
• Publisher: Dutton Juvenile (January 10, 2012)
• ISBN-10: 0525478817
• ISBN-13: 978-0525478812
• List Price: $17.99
• I finished this book on January 11

Okay. Right off the bat I need to tell you that I'm a nerdfighter. What's that? One of John and Hank Green's legion of fans. Author John and his brother Hank have a wildly successful youtube channel full of videos to each other. Seriously, clicking that link will make you cooler/a better person/more attractive. Nerdfighters battle to decrease world-suck. The motto is DFTBA which stands for Don't Forget to Be Awesome. I may or may not have a shirt that says Keep Calm and DFTBA (spoiler: I do). I should also tell you that I would probably leave my boyfriend for an opportunity to have lunch with John Green. (Sorry, Boyfriend). In the words of one of my students: I want to marry his brain. He's definitely on my Wall of Boyfriends at work. Yeah, that's a thing.

Anyway, one thing Nerdfighters are is internet savvy. There are about 8000 online homes for TFiOS love right now, not to mention several different websites devoted to Nerdfighteria. Including: TFios homes - pictures of happy people with their brand new copies of the book. Oh, did I mention that John Green notably signed all the copies of the first run of this book, so those that pre-ordered got books signed by him in various colored sharpies? Because he did and that's awesome. It was also accidentally released early by a Barnes and Noble slip-up that involved sending out pre-orders early. John was understandably upset that the book might have jerks spoil it. But, because Nerdfighteria is awesome many people promised not to open or read the book before it's official release date on January 10. I didn't pre-order (not sure why, I would have liked a signed copy) but I went to the store after work on Jan 10. As you could see by the info up top, I finished it Jan 11. Whatever else he is: John Green is highly readable.

Anyway, having said all that I'm not sure how much I need to actually talk about the book here, because there's just so much about it elsewhere online. Either way, here's the review:

First off - it's a cancer book. When I found out about that way back when I was all sad trombone noise. I do not like to cry. Actually, it's kind of a miracle I like John Green at all since my tastes tend to run more toward body counts, boobs and blood, or at least magic. I don't like my entertainment to be too feelingsy. And I knew Green + cancer book would = lots of feelings. Hurty ones. So feelingsy in fact, that someone posted this....

Original image, of course, from Hyperbole and a Half

And here's the thing, I was right, but it makes you feel ALL the feelings - sadness, sure. But also happiness and hope. So that's nice.

Anyway, the book is about Hazel, a teen who is diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and has to lug around an oxygen tank and a lot of sarcasm everywhere she goes. At the beginning of the book she goes to a support group for cancer teens and meets the dreamy Augustus Waters who is recovering from osteosarcoma. There is much banter and falling in love. I mean, these two have a lot in common: cancer, statistically improbably names, and a love of witty repartee.

So Hazel introduces Gus to her favorite book An Imperial Affliction (which also has it's own tumblr). It's a book about cancer (naturally) and the thing Hazel wants most (well, besides you know, a cure for cancer) is to meet the author. Gus, (because, did I mention he was dreamy?) figures out a way to make that happen. There's a cancertastic trip to Amsterdam and a lot of talk about Swedish rap music. It's very romantic (not the Swedish rap music, that sounds like the Swedish chef plus the Natalie Portman SNL rap video - and oooh Gus tells Hazel that she looks like Natalie in V for Vendetta. Full Circle!) . That's all the plot info you get.

One thing I love about Green's writing is that he isn't afraid to use wonderful vocab words (if you've read all of John's books and never had to check a dictionary, I bow to you). His characters are also so damn smart and funny and make these wonderful references. The title in fact, is a Shakespeare reference. My teenage self was not nearly that brilliant. Hell, my adult self isn't.

My favorite John Green is still An Abundance of Katherines, because I like things a little more silly. But I am very happy with this little dose of life a la John Green.

So now: please enjoy some hideous Swedish hip hop.

Soundtrack: Afasi & Filthy - Glider

Why I love the internet.

Okay - so, I think an important part of being a librarian is understanding technology. It's also important as a high school librarian to relate the student, to know what they're into.
This post is not about that. It's about my love for the internet. The internet has given us an absolutely insane amount of possibilities for both efficiency and screwing around. It is a big insane, frenetic, ever changing time suck. And it's impossible to explain to someone who thinks it's stupid why nayan cat is awesome and how happy autotuned crap makes me (my favorite autotune is of course, this one)
Now the reason I bring this up is because, as a nerdy blogging librarian I would be remiss if I didn't share with you my new favorite internet nonsense. Hey Girl, I Like The Library Too.
This is a chuck of awesome that consists of pictures of actor Ryan Gosling with lolcat captions about hitting on a librarian. And I effing love it. I love it so hard. I don't know how this stupid beautiful thing happened and I don't need to. I will just enjoy it.

Of course, now I have also discovered that there is a Ryan Gosling Reads Young Adult one too. Also fantastic.
Yes. Thank you Al Gore for inventing the internet so I can have this.
I would also like to mention that I had a pre-existing crush on my boyfriend Ryan Gosling ever since I discovered Dead Man's Bones - his weird/awesome band. You enjoy this nonsense I've shared with you. And this video...



You're welcome.

The A to Z Encyclopedia of Serial Killers by Harold Schechter and David Everitt

• Paperback: 352 pages
• Publisher: Pocket; Rev Upd edition (July 4, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1416521747
• ISBN-13: 978-1416521747
• List Price: $16.00
• I finished this book on July 30

Okay, so I picked this book up at the end of the school year one day, meaning to just peruse it briefly. That, by the way, is the way that many of my students pick it up. It's a great D.E.A.R. book for that reason, because you can read it for 10 to 40 minutes and then put it down and never look at it again.
Anyway, I brought the stupid thing home with me and I've been reading it on and off for weeks. My boyfriend thinks it's morbid, and, of course it is. But it's interesting too. It's especially interesting if you watch as many horror movies as I do (I love 'em!).
It's set up as a traditional encyclopedia with alphabetical entries and 'see alsos' embedded in the topics. What makes it so readable is the lurid and graphic writing style. It's written in dime store novel prose that makes it seem like you're getting gossip from that neighborhood lady who knows too much about (and rejoices in) other people's misfortunes and maybe likes a nip of sherry from time to time. It's also peppered with real life pictures, reproductions of notes, and photos of serial killer trading cards. Yes, that's right, there's serial killer trading cards, showing here:As with most encyclopedias, it's not meant to be read beginning to end, which is mostly what I was doing. It becomes a bit boring and repetitive that way, so I would say just jump around to what interests you. Another reason it becomes boring is because lots of the crimes are the same. Kill some folks, rape 'em, eat 'em. There's apparently lots more necrophilia and cannibalism than I realized. So, you know...yuck. The cool part is that it really goes beyond your Bundys and your Mansons and talks about lots of icky killers that aren't as well known.
Bottom line: is it sick? Yep. But you still know you're a little interested, you dirty bird.
Soundtrack: Psycho Killer by The Talking Heads.
Please enjoy this student-film-tacular video for the song. Oh the things you find on youtube. It's a little cheesy-graphic if you're weak tummied (but if you're weak tummied, why are you reading my blog?). This video reminds me how much I can't wait for my boyfriend Dexter to come back on. Sigh...Michael C. Hall. Yum....Oh, um..yeah, the video:

Duma Key by Stephen King

• Hardcover: 592 pages
• Publisher: Scribner; Export Ed. edition (January 22, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1416552510
• ISBN-13: 978-1416552512
• List Price: $28.00
• I finished this book on July 14

Okay, so, we know I lurve me some Stephen King. But I've come to realize that just because you love something doesn't always mean it's good. There are times when I smother my beau in the night (mostly when he beats me in Spite & Malice) and there are times when I am less than in love with a specific King story. But let me tell you, lovelies, that shit did not go down here. I devoured Duma Key in a way I haven't read anything recently. Last night I skipped going to the gym because I was nearing the end and I had to finish it.
Plotacular: Edgar Freemantle (such a King name, really) was a loaded construction guy who had a severe accident that left him minus an arm, and plus a fake hip, a bad leg and anger issues. On top of that his wife of a bajilion years says: "See ya!" and gets a divorce. Bad news bears. Edgar's will to live is fading fast and his shrink suggests a move to a new place and a return to a hobby that will make Edgar happy. So he shuffles off to a big crazy pink house on one of the Florida Keys and takes off drawing again. Drawing soon turns to painting and Edgar discovers he's eerily talented. Could it be his phanton limb pain helping him? Or his head injuries? Could it be the mysterious island he's on or it's few other occupants.
The story is riveting from the first few pages and keeps building slowly but steadily to an ending that made me skip Pilates (and I am a gal who loves Pilates). There is so much classic SK here, too. It's like putting on that big comfy cardigan that you've had forever on a chilly night and finding it just as snuggly as ever. The thing I love about his books is not only is there always an amazing story going on, but there is also a multitude of likable or intriguing characters (including one who says Jesus Krispies, which I have already added to my repertoire). This book reminds me a bit of Bag of Bones, which is one of the first books I reviewed here.
For more, go over to Amazon and watch my b/f SK discuss cooking this tale up in a little video.
Also, please enjoy a new feature: I'm the kind of person who associates music with everything and reading a book usually reminds me of several different songs for a variety of reasons. So, this is just a little extra: the song the book reminds me of.
So, for the first ever Soundtrack: Wave of Mutilation by the Pixies. Cause he's an amputee. And it's on a beach. Stop giving me that look, I don't have to explain myself to you :)

Blogoversary!

That's right, guys and ghouls, it's been one hot sexy year of blogging for this booknerd.
Also, remember how I did a 50 book recap? Well, after this post my next review will bring it up to 99 books in a year. Not too shabby.
I started the blog last year as a way for me to keep track of what I've read. I wanted to be able to look back and see, and I honestly didn't think anyone would read it. So, thanks, my lovelies.
Some fun facts:

• I have read 26527 pages this year.
• I have given the bee seal of approval 9 times.
• The biggest tags on my tag cloud are: Supernatural and YA
  
• Many of the books I read since the 50 book benchmark are series, for example: His Dark Materials, The Twilight Saga, the Abhorsen Trilogy, and of course, Harry Potter.
  
• I added a tag called "In which I claim to be dating someone famous" because I like to say that people are my boyfriend all the time. Here's the ranking on that so far: Stephen King - wins it with 5 times. Trent Reznor - 2. Snape/Alan Rickman - 3. Tim Curry - 1. Laurie Halse Anderson - 1. My actual real life boyfriend? Yeah, I mentioned him once. Only to tell you that he's a slower reader than me. Pwned!

In addition: I have been contacted by two different authors of books I've reviewed this year. Because I am fucking awesome. Who are they? Guess. Seriously. Okay, I'll tell you. Laura M. Zeises commented on my review of her book: here. Graham Joyce sent me a meebo message and friended me on myspace (I'm basically goddamn famous). This gave me major warm fuzzies and a hugely big head. I'm now sitting around and waiting for SK or Mr. Gaiman to waltz on by and ask me to tea (or not).

Also, please enjoy another booknerd recap feature: What keywords brought you here? The following are keywords people used and ended up here. Last time there were lots more sex ones, seems I'm loosing my touch, or, people are getting better at finding internet porn.

• wikipedia warm fuzzies (aw)
  
• whats cher doing lately does she have a boyfriend (i dunno, but she's probly not gonna date you)
  
• invisible man movie sex (huh? perv. i think)
• sexy indian
• dark witchraft (spooky)
• sexy lines stephen king books (heehee)
• sexy male pictures
• rebels rape pretty girls (yucko)

So, Merry New Year, my darlings, and thank you for reading. Please allow me to suggest some resolutions for you: add booknerd to your RSS feeds. Tell a friend about this kickass blog. Comment on booknerd. Talk to bee on meebo (cause she's nice!)
Seriously, thanks for reading.
Cheers!

P.S. the nerdy cake images are from a blog post, here. If you're interested in baking me a cake I would like a Labyrinth theme cake, please and thank you (Bridget, I'm looking at you).

Inexcusable by Chris Lynch

• Reading level: Young Adult
  
• Paperback: 165 pages
• Publisher: Simon Pulse (May 8, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1416939725
• ISBN-13: 978-1416939726
• List Price: $6.99
• I finished this book on Nov. 2

So, first off, I have to say that I think this cover is good and everything, but to me, I do not think it speaks to what the book is really about. To me, a stray bra makes me think fun sexy times are to be had. And trust me, that's not what's going on here. What is going on here? Date rape. Boo that.
In describing this book to an English Teacher at my school I said it is like the opposite story of the book Speak. From the mind of the rapist instead of the raped. Yikes, huh. And, for the record, author of Speak, my girlfriend Laurie Halse Anderson has a quote on the back of the book: "...The world needs this story. And you want to read it, trust me." So, yeah: here's the setup. Keir is a high school senior and he tells this story, which alternates between his graduation from high school and the night he is accused of date rape. In reading this I knew there was something wrong with Keir, and eventually you start to realize that the way he describes things is not really the way a rational person might see them. But his narrative makes me think there is something wrong with him. Some sort of social thing, he doesn't seem to have much of a conscience, and mostly bases this opinions of right and wrong on how other people react to him. Keir keeps saying that he's a good guy, but his evidence for this is never a good deed he's done, it's always based on another person's opinion. Super Weird.
So, he claims he's in love with poor Gigi Boudakian (who's the kind of person you always refer to by their whole name, apparently) and she is the girl who accuses him. There is a sort of mounting suspense during Keir's tale of graduation, going to parties, doing drugs...because the whole time you know what's going to happen. It's very bad news.
It was interesting to see this side of the story and of course, somewhat disturbing. Don't be fooled by that cover, though. There is no fun sex romp to be had within.

Dreamcatcher by Stephen King

• Paperback: 684 pages
• Publisher: Albin Michel (April 9, 2003)
• ISBN-10: 2226131906
• ISBN-13: 978-2226131904
• List Price: $7.99
• I finished this book on Oct. 27

So, as you know, I lurve me some Stephen King. And oddly, I have never read this book before. However, I did watch the film version from 2003 when it came out in theaters. Now, the movie actually follows the book pretty closely but for two things: though Morgan Freeman is effin awesome, he's not Kurtz in my head. You know who is? Maybe a crazy Kevin Spacey, I dunno. The other thing is: was there some obsession with the song Blue Bayou in the movie? I seem to remember that, but it's totally not in the book. (and great, now I have it in my head mmm Linda Ronstadt is dreamy...)
Okay, back on task: shit weasels. That's right. This one is about creepy crawly skeeviati monsters. And evil foliage. Oh, I'm sorry, did you want a real synopsis? Here goes: a group of four friends go camping in the Maine woods and aliens slowly start to take over the world via red fuzz and creepy parasites that cause their hosts to cook up some super-funktastic farts. Also, the superfriends have a mysterious fifth pal, Duddits, whose powers have rubbed off a bit on the others. My friends did give me a Harry Potter Sorting Hat, but that's not quite as cool as goddamn telepathy. Just sayin...
So, this book was super gross and cool. One of the characters gets sort of taken over by an alien and lives for a while in an office in his own head. I loved those scenes, I got chills once or twice somewhere in there. Another example of the magic of my b/f SK. I read this book for the challenge and it gets extra points for allowing me to type the phrase 'shit-weasels' (there! I said it again. hee)

A Clockwork Orange: film review

• Based on the book: A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
• Directed by Stanley Kubrick
• Written by Anthony Burgess (book) and Stanley Kubrick (screenplay)
• Warner Bros. (1971)
• rated R
• 136 min
• I watched this film on Oct 8

Alright, kiddos, I read this one way back when, near the beginning of this blog. (Actually, my review of it kind of sucks, I'm much funnier now, I feel) So, anyway, I'd never seen the flick. I think for some reason in high school my male pals didn't want me to watch it cause they though it was gonna be too violent for me or something. Hee. Pussies.
So, our young ne'er-do-well, Alex, is a total violent nutbar. He gets into trouble, gets cured and gets un-cured again. I've got to say, I dig their outfits and the milk bar is super cool looking. I totally want to drink my diet pepsi with lemon at a bar with creepy white naked mannequins, effin rad. It was nice to hear that crazy made up language being spoken and I felt all kinds of smart because I had sort of memorized it when I read the book. I totally want to start calling people my droogs and referring to my head as my gulliver. Think that will fly?
Also: let's talk about Malcolm McDowell for a second, k? Linderman was looking kinda good in this, a bit like Ewan McGregor, I feel. All I'm saying is, I might have wanted to make out with him a little. Either way, he had fantastic hair. Also, why I do I remember him from Milk Money so much? Really, why do I remember that movie at all? Ack.
Back on task: so this film followed the book pretty well, but why leave out the last chapter? Boo that. (if you're interested in reading a super in depth synopsis check this out, but really, if you're that interested just watch it) Either way this one followed the story a lot more faithfully than Kubrick's adaptation of my boyfriend Stephen King's The Shining. All in all, I didn't really find this movie all that violent. Maybe with today's standards of gorno movies I am desensitized. Either way, extra points for lots of gratuitous breastages and a giant ceramic boypart.

Dracula by Bram Stoker

• Paperback: 432 pages
• Publisher: Bantam Classics (November 1, 1983)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0553212710
• ISBN-13: 978-0553212716
• List Price: $4.95
• I finished this book on August 21

Okay my lovelies. Here's the thing, I have mentioned about a billion times that I love vampires, but the truth is: I had never read this before. The place where it all started. For shame. Also, I have seen the 1992 film version so many times that I could not stop picturing those actors as the characters. Boo!
Anywho: I'm sure everyone knows the story of this one. However, if you haven't read it and you are going on popular perception of it, you've probably got it wrong. First, there is no love affair between Mina and Sirius Black, I mean Gary Oldman, I mean Count Dracula. The 1992 movie led us to believe that Mina was all "Blood? Yes, please!" But that's not the case. Also, Neo's portrayal of Jonathan Harker in that movie may lead you to believe that Harker is, in fact, a tool. This is not so. In fact, one thing I was continually struck by is how good the people in this book are. They are almost unrealistically kind and understanding. I wanted to hug them. Also, Dracula is not killed by a stake to the heart. I'm just saying...
The book is written in journal entries and newspaper clippings which is very cool. You get to see all the different characters points of view and it's not as cheesy as the switch off chapter narration of some books. I have to say that even though I knew what was going to happen I was still very invested in the melodrama of it all. I can see why this book spawned such an empire. From crazy fan sites, to movies, to being studied in school to delicious breakfast cereal. Mmmm, marshmallow bats...
Though in my head I am definitely cooking up a sexier version of vampires (1/2 Edward from Twilight and 1/2 my boyfriend Trent Reznor perhaps?) I feel a much better vamp enthusiast having read this. And I promise: I will certainly be picking up more classic gothic horror in the near future.

Dissecting Stephen King by Heidi Strengell

• Paperback: 320 pages
• Publisher: Popular Press 3; New Ed edition (March 15, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0299209741
• ISBN-13: 978-0299209742
• Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 0.8 inches
• List Price: $26.95
• I finished this book on August 5

The subtitle to this book is From the Gothic to Literary Naturalism, but I swear that it's much more interesting than it would lead you to believe. Let take the cover, for example. I don't know if you can see from this image but in the picture instead of rib bones what you see inside this dissected chest are typebars from a typewriter. Cool.
Anwho, as you know I am a "constant reader" of (and often claim to be dating) Stephen King. And, because I am a turbo-nerd I am often compelled to read non-fiction books about things in which I am interested. Hence, the SK non-fiction book. I actually took out several from the library to peruse, but this one caught my attention the most.
Inside, author Heidi Strengell dissects the works of SK (did I basically just tell you what you already know from the title? You bet!). She talks about how his work is related to the Gothic tradition, including a drawn out comparison of King's Salem's Lot to popular gothic masterpiece, Dracula (for more info on Gothic books, click here). Then she talks about the myth/fairy tale tradition in King, discussing his "multiverse" and a cool part about how The Dark Tower series, is, among other things, a western, a gothic and an apocalyptic fable. Finally she ends up talking about King using literary naturalism, discussing things like: his use of free will, genetic determinism and the idea of fate.
Strengell herself is mysterious, not having published anything not about SK (more obsessed than me, perhaps?) but if you're interested in reading an essay of hers, then check it out here. So, because she clearly spends too much time thinking about SK she does point out some really interesting stuff and uses tons of examples from a variety of his books. After this I feel I need to go immediately and read Dracula and compare it with Salem's Lot. And eat Count Chocula. (mmm, marshmallow bats) so look forward to that in the near future.
When I was in undergrad I took a course called Philosophy in Literature for which we read several books I hated (who shall remain nameless). And my professor for that class (who shall also remain nameless, but I will note that he habitually wore Chuck Taylors) once went on a tirade about how Stephen King was awful and ruining literature etc. and that he had a magic computer that spit out his books at random according to a formula. Actually, that sounds more like a Stephen King novel premise than reality, doesn't it? Anyway, I remember at the time being very heated by these comments and wanting to make a rebuttal that King's work was popular for a reason. Perhaps I could give Mr. ChuckTaylors a copy of this book. Okay, maybe not. Really, I would only recommend this book to someone who was a big fan and has read a lot of King's work since it relies so heavily on examples. If you are interested, check out King's website.
Happily, even though I have read lots of King, there are still many more of his books out there waiting for me.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling

• Reading level: Ages 9-12
  
• Hardcover
• Publisher: Arthur A. Levine Books (July 21, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0545010225
• ISBN-13: 978-0545010221
• List Price: $34.99
• I finished this book on July 21
  

Well, my lovelies, it's finally here. I went to midnight madness at our local Borders and let me tell you, it was nuts. There were awesome costumes, my favorites were: a perfect Professor Sprout, a teenage Bellatrix Lestrange, and an amazing Luna Lovegood. There was also a tiny baby dressed up like a house elf: effin cute. Anywho: my boyfriend and I got our books and our complementary posters and ran home to read (guess who is a faster reader, and therefore way cooler? Oh, that's right, this girl). Let me tell you, my dears: we were not disappointed. Hence, the bee seal of approval.
Because you can find spoilers pretty much everwhere on the internet there will probably be a few light ones in here, so beware. However, if you're a diehard I'm sure you've finished by now (unless you're my dad, who will probably still be reading next week).
First off, several of my theories were right, because I am awesome. I liked to see Harry being a bit of a badass in this one. Who calls Voldemort "Tom Riddle"? Only badasses, that's who! Face! Anywho, Ron acts like a baby and then gets over it, and Hermione is a bit more emotional in this book than we've ever seen her which was very cool. Other acts of coolness were committed by: McGonagall, Momma Weasley and of course, Neville, the dark horse.
My favorite part of this book was that we got to see a lot more realistic, 3 dimensional portrayals of some of the characters. Was Dumbledore perfect? Nope, but he was still an amazing wizard and mentor to Harry. Oh, and my boyfriend Snape? Mmm, we are gonna make out (because, you know, he's real).
Overall I was very pleased with this book, though I will admit I'm awfully sad it's over. I will definitely have to reread this one, I'm thinking in the wintertime, when it will taste like comfort food. Anyway: just because it's over doesn't mean I can't yell spells all over the apartment. (the cats especially love this.) Bombarda!
Oooh! Oooh! I almost forgot, there was a bit of swearing in this one! Besides the normal ones like "bloody" (love the Brits) there were a few Bastards, several Arses and a few "effing" which had me cackling at my book. Oh, I love swearing and I love HP and when the two come together it's like a hug from Jesus. Anyway, if you were fighting the Dark Lord you'd be cursing too. I know I would be. And yelling spells. Expelliarmus!
Update: My boyfriend Stephen King has written an amazing review of this book here which you should read. Now. Go do it.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling

• Reading level: Ages 9-12
  
• Paperback: 652 pages
• Publisher: Scholastic Paperbacks (July 25, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0439785960
• ISBN-13: 978-0439785969
• List Price: $9.99

Okay, boys and girls. I have finished this re-reading this just in time to get my hot little nerdy hands onto the seventh and final in the Harry Potter series. The new book comes out tonight at midnight and I will be there with a big orange wristband and bells on.
I'm pretty sure that anyone who plans of ever reading HP knows what happens in this book and those who haven't have had things spoiled by them for sure. However: here is your spoiler warning! In this book HP and the gang are trying to get through a year where they don't battle Voldemort. Actually, they succeed, but fighting his death eaters is just as bad it turns out. Highlights of the book: I am happy to see Ginny and Harry snogging. Hopefully Ron and Hermione next? I am happy Luna made it through the fight. I like her, and I was worried that her secondary character nature might make her a target for J.K. Rowling's Hand of Doom. One more book to go, Luna, hang on! Total upsetting bummers. Um, gee, I dunno my boyfriend Snape killing Dumbledore? That's a pretty huge bummer. I definitely cried the first time I read it and almost became teary again this time during the funeral scene.
The coolest thing about this book is learning more about Voldemort's past. Also, Horcruxes are a very cool idea and completely badass. I also really liked getting to hang out with Dumbledore in this book. It was nice, and cozy, and I wish Dumbledore was my grandfather. Also, points to Fleur for still wanting to marry Bill even though his face is effed up. And p.s. I am totally psyched by the romance between Tonks and Lupin.
So, anyway: here are some of my theories, which are completely unsubstantiated and soon to be proven wrong. 1. Dumbledore really is dead 2. Snape is good. Those are basically the big ones. I have based my life on Snape being good, and will be seriously annoyed if this is not the case. Though, in all honesty, I would probably still make out with Alan Rickman if given the opportunity. I also think that Sirius might come back from the mystery grave. Here's why: that was the most bullshit death ever! Ooh, I got hit by a hex and stumbled into an archway of death. Balls! I say boo to it, and I hope he resurfaces. Also, who is going to be head of Gryffindor house now? I say maybe...Hagrid? I dunno.
So it's only a few hours away and I'm avoiding anyplace on the interweb that might lead me to a spoiler. So, if you are doing the same I send you to this completely safe place to take a fun sorting quiz (cause we can't all be cool enough to have a sorting hat at home like yours truly). Go here and see where you belong. The quiz said I was a Ravenclaw, which I buy. I like to think I'm smart but also acknowledge that I'm not as tough as maybe I should be. Okay, I'm off to nap in preparation for the late night of reading I will be doing. (p.s. I can't stop yelling spells in British accents) Sectusempre!

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling

• Reading level: Ages 9-12
• Paperback: 870 pages
• Publisher: Scholastic Paperbacks (August 10, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0439358078
• ISBN-13: 978-0439358071
• List Price: $9.99
• I finished this book on July 16

Okay, as you may have guessed I am a huge Harry Potter fan. And, since the new book is coming out in 4 days I had decided to refresh my memory of the 5th and 6th books. Of course I waited too long and now I'm spending lots of time reading HP to get it done before midnight madness on Friday. My favorite thing to do lately since re-reading these is shouting spells at people. Stupify! Reducto!
Anyway, firstly I will confess that number 5 (OOTP) was not my favorite in the series. There is a lot of teenage brooding (Harry) and actually, a bit of adult brooding as well (Sirius) but rereading it after just seeing the new movie did bring some things back into light for me.
In this book Harry and the forces of good (AKA The Order of the Phoenix) battle the forces of bad (AKA Voldemort and friends) by staying in a dank house, getting lots of detentions and trying to pass exams. Worst synopsis ever? You bet! Anyway: I really liked reading about the Dumbledore's Army classes and hearing the Prophesy again. Also, hearing the Prophesy again made me revise a few of my theories about the upcoming last book (which I will share with you in my next review). Did you remember that the prophesy could have been about Neville? I totally forgot that!
We also get to hear a lot more about Dumbledore and his plans and reasoning for things, which I dig. He gets a bit sentimental in that scene, actually (Aww, someone lurves Harry.) However, one of my favorites dies in this book which pisses me off (also, they effed that bit up in the film).
I liked the new movie version of this a lot, mostly because it cut out a lot of the angsty whining of the kids and added a little more action. Though, I must say, Mr. Daniel Radcliff is looking a bit old to be the 15 year old wizard he is portraying. He looks like maybe we could date in real life. Not that I'm interested of course, cause, you know... I like the old men. So, yeah, that's right, I have my heart set on Snape. Or, as I like to call him, Alan Rickman, my boyfriend. Cause he's a kickass legilimens. Dig it.
If you haven't read the books I highly suggest doing so. Unless of course...you hate fun! If you have read the books and have questions try reading some Harry Potter wikis. Yeah, that's right, there are more than one. Good ones are here, and here. If you want to read college thesis level examinations and conspiracy theories about Harry Potter than go to this site whose very name used to be a spoiler. Or enjoy MuggleNet. If you are into board games I highly recommend Harry Potter Scene-It.
And, in case you guys labored under the delusion that I am anything other than a completely flaming dorky power nerd: please enjoy a picture of me in the sorting hat. Gryffindor!

The Secretary of Dreams by Stephen King illustrated by Glenn Chadbourne

• Hardcover: 290 pages
• Publisher: Cemetery Dance Publications (October 30, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1587671409
• ISBN-13: 978-1587671401
• List Price: $75.00
• I finished this book July 7th

Okay, friends and neighbors, you all know I'm a Stephen King "constant reader". Also, you know I dig on the graphic novels and comics. So, imagine my happiness last fall when I heard I could purchase some of SK's short stories newly illustrated. I hinted that I wanted this gift for Christmas (by hint I mean I sent the link to the Amazon page and where to buy it to my boyfriend via e-mail. cause I'm stealthy like that.) and his parents bought it for me. However, it was on this crazy backorder or something and I only just got it now. Let me tell you this, my lovlies, it is sexy! It's big and hard bound and came with this faux leather case deal. Fancy.
So, the actual stories are all ones I've read before, of course. I was impressed that they were some of his lesser known ones. The first is called Home Delivery and is actually from a collection called Book of the Dead which is all zombie stories from different authors. There are 6 short stories in all, 3 are just illustrated about every other page and the others are written as though they are comic books. So, it's a really cool idea. However, I'm not in love with the illustrator's work, to be honest. It's gory, to be certain, but it's all black and white sort of scratchy pen lines to me, and I didn't love it. Apparently Glenn (with 2 n's, why?) is an illustrator from Maine (shock!) and you can read an interview with him here. He has already signed on for volume two and is hard at work. These are put out by Cemetery Dance who is also putting out the Dark Tower Series as comic books (which, you know, I want super bad too).
Honestly, I will probably get the second volume too, though I'm not a huge fan of the art. Mostly because Stephen King is my boyfriend (I think you should know that when I say that I'm saying it in the Frau Blücher voice from Young Frankenstein) Maybe the artwork will grow on me. I guess I was expecting some super creepy art like from Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. Let's not pretend that stuff didn't scare the crap out of you when you were little (or last night, you wuss!). See creepy images, here, here and here. Hell's bells, creepy stuff, people.

Lirael: Daughter of the Clayr by Garth Nix

• Audio Cassette
• Publisher: Listening Library; Unabridged edition (May 14, 2002)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0807205583
• ISBN-13: 978-0807205587
• List Price: $40.00
• I finished listening to this audio book on May 16

So, my lovelies, I know you are wondering why it's been so long since my last post (16 days, an egregious time lapse). Well, this girl got mono. That's right, the kissing disease. And you'd think that it would make for some good reading time, but that's not the case. Anywho, I finally finished this one, and I promise there's more coming in a timely manner.
So, let's get to the matter at hand. This book is the sequel of sorts to Sabriel, though we don't get to really see Sabriel or Touchstone very much. The book centers on the title character Lirael and also on the son of Sabriel and Touchstone, Sam. Lirael is a Clayr - a mystical group who sees the future. Except, Lirael doesn't see the future, and she doesn't look like the other Clayr either (who does she look like, you're wondering? I'll tell you: Sabriel). Lirael is super broken up about this, despite the fact that she is wicked good at charter magic and even conjured/summoned herself up a pal: the Disreputable Dog (yes! You know this girl loves animals that talk!). Also, I love Lirael because she is a librarian. That's right, she works in the great library of the Clayr. When you work there you get a clockwork emergency mouse that magically runs for help in case you get into a tight spot. I'm totally jealous.
Anyway, Sam is supposed to be the Abhorsen in waiting, but he's a total wuss about going into death. So, this story has some serious angst about fitting in and finding your destiny and the major mystery of Lirael's parentage was pretty obvious to me. I still liked it though, even though it tricked me and didn't end. That's right, this exciting tale continues in the final book: Abhorsen in which - I require the following things to happen: (in no particular order) someone to tell me more about the origins of the Disreputable Dog, Sam to stop being a total girly man and Lirael to kiss someone - anyone.
Also, I require more Tim Curry to read to me. If you haven't tried books on tape I highly recommend them - it's a superior way to travel. I strongly believe that there would be no road rage if everyone was hearing a good story in their car. If you're interested here's a list of other books that Tim Curry (my boyfriend) has read on tape. Thank me later

Heart Shaped Box by Joe Hill

• Hardcover: 384 pages
• Publisher: William Morrow (February 13, 2007)
• ISBN-10: 0061147931
• ISBN-13: 978-0061147937
• List Price: $24.95
• I finished this book on Mar. 13

So, okay, remember in my last post where I was groaning that I needed a good old ghost story to help me get over wasting 320 pages of my life reading about rich, snobby....zzzzzz. Oh! Sorry, fell asleep a little bit there. Anyway, this little beauty totally hit the spot for me. Thank you, Mr. Hill!
Judas Coyne (best rock star name ever?) is an aging rock star who specializes in gothy darkness in the vein of (my boyfriend) Trent Reznor. Mr Coyne keeps a collection of macarbe artifacts; so when the opportunity comes up to buy a ghost online (in the form of the dead man's would-be burial suit) he jumps at it. Long story short this is a real and terrifying ghost and there is more behind the ghost buying scheme than meets the eye. Crazy scribble eyed ghost man comes and menaces Jude and his girlfriend Georgia (yeah, that's right, they both have myspace pages. dig it.) Okay, so the dead people with black scribbles over their eyes really creep me out. Why is it always the eyes? Remember creepy button eyes? Cripes. So anywho, many personal demons as well as actual ghosts (I was tempted to call them flesh and blood ghosts there, but I thought better of it) are faced and the whole thing is really a good ride.
Now the truth: I read this book because someone left a review of it for me in the inbox at work (pays to be a vocal booknerd). We are both Stephen King fans, and guess what? Joe Hill happens to be Mr. King's son. Apparently, everyone in that family loves pseudonyms (right, Richard Bachman?) But I can't blame him for wanting to distance himself from his father's giganticized shadow. And the book really surpassed my expectations. The answer to the big question? Is it like his dad's books? A bit. Is it his own as well? I think so. There is only a faint sniff of SK in there, not an overpowering stench.
But I have to say this about that: he totally sounds like his father and shares the strange (Maine accent, I'm guessing) cadence to his speaking voice. Where did I hear it? On his super cool website where he talks about the new book. There is a cool song and cool graphics. There is also a trailer for the book, and I love that. It reminds me of book outtakes, which I also love. Well played, Mr. Hill.