Booknerd

Holy hell that's a scary mask, or, Movie Trailer: John Dies at the End

2012-01-28T10:12:00.000-08:00

Okay - so...I read this book over the summer and I'm super excited for the movie. I was very excited when I found out that Don Coscarelli was making it and Paul Giamatti is going to be in it. Thought there's no release date yet right now it's premiering at Sundance (read a review here)

The book is about a loser guy and his friend who ingest a trippy drug called Soy Sauce which gives them crazy abilities. You don't really need me to tell you any more that that because you should just that it's ridiculous and awesome. But here's some random words that relate to the film: Meat Monster, Televangelist, Bob Marley, Jennifer Lopez, girl with one hand.

Here's the website, the Facebook and the IMDb.

Two cool links:

2012-01-28T09:36:00.001-08:00

Hi there. So, this week I found two different cool and bookish girl approved links I'd like to share.
The first is: Book Mooch
This is a site where you can send your unwanted books out into the world to people who really want them and get ones you do want from others. It's free to join and free to ask for books from others. The only costs for you is the shipping to send your books out. Each member has an account gets and spends points by completing actions on the site. You can read all about it before you sign up.
I've just signed up so I can't report too much more on it, but it seems really cool to me. Just because I didn't like a book doesn't mean that it isn't going to be great for someone else. And in theory, I can get stuff I want for free. So...if you got lots of books on your shelf that you don't need to hang on to, then consider signing up.

The next one is Chapter One through the Washington Post. This site allows you to read the first chapter of lots of new books. It's got a nice assortment of fiction and non-fiction. It's pretty cool to be able to check something out before committing.

Enjoy!

Quote of the day

2012-01-24T12:00:00.000-08:00

“You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.”

~Ray Bradbury

Book Review: Carter Finally Gets It by Brent Crawford

2012-01-19T15:44:00.001-08:00

Hardcover: 304 pages

Publisher: Hyperion Books CH (April 7, 2009)

ISBN: 1423112466

List Price: $6.40

I finished this book on January 17

Kayso, I'm giving this book as a selection for the Book Club I run at school because we will be meeting the author at the Teen Book Festival in May. I can't wait for them to read it because I know they will love it.
The story is about Carter, a brand new baby Freshman boy with ADD and a stutter. Our story starts during the summer right before school starts. Anyone who teaches high school knows that Freshmen are really 8th graders for a good portion of 9th grade. Carter, whose ADD makes it very hard to focus on anything, is definitely immature. He's part of the popular crew and he plays football, though he doesn't really like it. He goes to high school parties he doesn't really want to go to, and he tries like whoa to have sex with some girls. He makes a lot of mistakes. Many of them are embarrassing. He accidentally breaks some hearts and has his broken.
The book has many qualities you'd expect from a book told by a 14 year old boy. There are fart jokes (I don't care who you are, fart jokes are always hilarious) and many deep thoughts on the differences between girl boobs and lady boobs (boobs are pretty much the only thing Carter can focus on).
The author, Brent Crawford, also suffers from ADD. He presumably also once suffered from being a 14 year old boy. His writing style is real and engaging, even if the narrative seems on fast forward sometimes (much like the VHS tape that Carter buys in the book. Hint: it's porn). Crawford is also an actor, and apparently a jean aficionado - which is weird but kind of awesome.
The book goes from slapsticky to serious smoothly. The whole last fourth of it just tickled my high school nerd girl so hard, but I'll let you figure it out for yourself. I'll leave you with my favorite quote from Carter:

"I think when you tap into something that you really want to do, you have to fight for it, even if the fight is with yourself."

Soundtrack: Luck Be a Lady Tonight from Guys and Dolls
(You'll have to read the book to figure out why)

The Importance of Writing Space

2012-01-15T09:54:00.001-08:00

I wanted to share with you this cool link I found the other day, which is a blog where authors display their writing space. It's called Write Place, Write Time.
I think this is pretty cool. I found it while I was on A.S. King's website (she's too BA to even call her my girlfriend, but you know...I'd take her on a date if I could). Here's a link to her entry. Joe Hill, one of my favorites also had a recent entry complete with cute pictures of his corgi (Squee! That's my second most wanted breed of dog!)
Some of these authors have extremely fancy offices some of them have a crazy mess happening (I'm looking at you, Peter Straub).
This is also timely because I spent a good deal of yesterday futzing around with my desk and office area in order to make it more streamlined. I argued to myself that this was a good use of time (you know...instead of writing) because it would make the space more...inspiring...user friendly...etc. This is crap, of course. As an amateur writer with lofty hopes and dreams it's somehow very easy for me to fritter away time that could otherwise be spent on writing.
So...on to writing....

Book Review: The Fault in Our Stars

2012-01-15T06:35:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Ages 14 and up
Hardcover: 336 pages
Publisher: Dutton Juvenile (January 10, 2012)
ISBN-10: 0525478817
ISBN-13: 978-0525478812
List Price: $17.99
I finished this book on January 11

Okay. Right off the bat I need to tell you that I'm a nerdfighter. What's that? One of John and Hank Green's legion of fans. Author John and his brother Hank have a wildly successful youtube channel full of videos to each other. Seriously, clicking that link will make you cooler/a better person/more attractive. Nerdfighters battle to decrease world-suck. The motto is DFTBA which stands for Don't Forget to Be Awesome. I may or may not have a shirt that says Keep Calm and DFTBA (spoiler: I do). I should also tell you that I would probably leave my boyfriend for an opportunity to have lunch with John Green. (Sorry, Boyfriend). In the words of one of my students: I want to marry his brain. He's definitely on my Wall of Boyfriends at work. Yeah, that's a thing.

Anyway, one thing Nerdfighters are is internet savvy. There are about 8000 online homes for TFiOS love right now, not to mention several different websites devoted to Nerdfighteria. Including: TFios homes - pictures of happy people with their brand new copies of the book. Oh, did I mention that John Green notably signed all the copies of the first run of this book, so those that pre-ordered got books signed by him in various colored sharpies? Because he did and that's awesome. It was also accidentally released early by a Barnes and Noble slip-up that involved sending out pre-orders early. John was understandably upset that the book might have jerks spoil it. But, because Nerdfighteria is awesome many people promised not to open or read the book before it's official release date on January 10. I didn't pre-order (not sure why, I would have liked a signed copy) but I went to the store after work on Jan 10. As you could see by the info up top, I finished it Jan 11. Whatever else he is: John Green is highly readable.

Anyway, having said all that I'm not sure how much I need to actually talk about the book here, because there's just so much about it elsewhere online. Either way, here's the review:

First off - it's a cancer book. When I found out about that way back when I was all sad trombone noise. I do not like to cry. Actually, it's kind of a miracle I like John Green at all since my tastes tend to run more toward body counts, boobs and blood, or at least magic. I don't like my entertainment to be too feelingsy. And I knew Green + cancer book would = lots of feelings. Hurty ones. So feelingsy in fact, that someone posted this....

Original image, of course, from Hyperbole and a Half

And here's the thing, I was right, but it makes you feel ALL the feelings - sadness, sure. But also happiness and hope. So that's nice.

Anyway, the book is about Hazel, a teen who is diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and has to lug around an oxygen tank and a lot of sarcasm everywhere she goes. At the beginning of the book she goes to a support group for cancer teens and meets the dreamy Augustus Waters who is recovering from osteosarcoma. There is much banter and falling in love. I mean, these two have a lot in common: cancer, statistically improbably names, and a love of witty repartee.

So Hazel introduces Gus to her favorite book An Imperial Affliction (which also has it's own tumblr). It's a book about cancer (naturally) and the thing Hazel wants most (well, besides you know, a cure for cancer) is to meet the author. Gus, (because, did I mention he was dreamy?) figures out a way to make that happen. There's a cancertastic trip to Amsterdam and a lot of talk about Swedish rap music. It's very romantic (not the Swedish rap music, that sounds like the Swedish chef plus the Natalie Portman SNL rap video - and oooh Gus tells Hazel that she looks like Natalie in V for Vendetta. Full Circle!) . That's all the plot info you get.

One thing I love about Green's writing is that he isn't afraid to use wonderful vocab words (if you've read all of John's books and never had to check a dictionary, I bow to you). His characters are also so damn smart and funny and make these wonderful references. The title in fact, is a Shakespeare reference. My teenage self was not nearly that brilliant. Hell, my adult self isn't.

My favorite John Green is still An Abundance of Katherines, because I like things a little more silly. But I am very happy with this little dose of life a la John Green.

So now: please enjoy some hideous Swedish hip hop.

Soundtrack: Afasi & Filthy - Glider

Quote of the day

2012-01-12T04:01:00.000-08:00

"When writing a novel, a writer should create living people."
~Ernest Hemingway

I found this when I was looking for a quote for my writing board in our office. I put it on my cast list (upcoming post about that) and I like it. However, the problem is...half of my main characters are ghosts. Teehee!

Fun fact: Hemingway hated ghosts. And people looking at his neck.

Amazing Book video

2012-01-11T17:25:00.000-08:00

Please enjoy this crazy cool stop animation video shared with me by the great and wonderful S.G.

Book Review: Beauty Queens by Libba Bray

2012-01-11T16:19:00.000-08:00

Audio CD
Publisher: Scholastic Audio Books; Unabridged edition (May 24, 2011)
ISBN-10: 0545315387
ISBN-13: 978-0545315388
I finished listening to this audiobook on January 8

I feel like from the cover you could tell that I HAD to read this book. Also, I have a long history of loving Libba Bray. Here are my reviews of her awesome historical fiction/paranormal romance the Great and Terrible Beauty series, here, here and here. She also has a book about mad cow disease which is in my towering to be read pile.

The story is about what happens when an airplane full of teenage beauty queens crash lands on a Lost-like island. Long story short: shenanigans ensue. There is an evil corporation, a Sarah Palin type character named Ladybird Hope, reality tv show pirates and all sorts of other amazing things. Shockingly, the girls don't go all Lord of the Flies on it. Instead they learn to survive and actually turn pretty kick-ass. They find out that they are good at things other than being pretty. They find hallucinogenic fruit. All good things. To boot -the story is broken up by hilarious footnotes and commercials.

What makes this even better was the reading by author Libba Bray. She does a host of amazing voices, from pageant loving Miss Texas to Momo B. Chacha. Oh, what? I forgot to tell you about Momo B. Chacha? Okay, he's an Elvis obsessed dictator of the Republic of Chacha who is working on a secret arms deal and creepy relationship with Ladybird Hope. (I imagine Momo as looking like Kim Jong Il in an Elvis costume (which is, unbelievably, something you can google image search) If you're wondering what this all looks like, I've gotcha covered.

Young love

There are so many adorable characters and great subplots in this book it's hard to tell you about all of it's awesomeness. The book was feminist and awesome without being preachy. There was much laughing out loud by me in my car like a creep. I highly recommend it for girls, people who used to be girls, and people who know girls. One more thing: if you don't read it, you'll never know who General Goodtimes is.

Soundtrack: Killer Queen by Queen

The Finer Points of Fines

2012-01-07T12:52:00.000-08:00

Holy crap, y'all. Okay, so I'm a cnn.com junkie. And today, I'm reading and I see an article titled "Police enforcement of library lending leaves 5 year-old in tears." I reluctantly click to read the article while thinking "Oh hell, ladies...really?"
So yeah - basically the public library in Charlton Massachusetts sent a "friendly" police reminder to 13 local residents to remind them that their library books were overdue. Understandably said delinquent patrons were not impressed. Then...to take matters further into crazy town the library spokesperson told the paper that they felt that the police visits would be "be a kinder way, a friendly reminder saying 'Hey can you bring this back,' rather than sending a summons," because she is high. Holy crap. If you want to see the local news report complete with little girl saying "I was scared" click here. I can only assume that each of her adorable dimples is a coffin nail in someone's career.
You know what? I get it, it sucks when people don't bring things back. The library I work for charges 5cents per day per overdue item with a cap at $5. To be honest, this does not really entice many of our worst offenders to bring back anything. In our school the fines are meant to be a deterrent to overdues, and we are usually willing to let kids slide if they are polite. We are almost always willing to make a deal. We make it very clear to them that we'd rather have our books back then take their money. I understand that these people in Massachusetts want their stuff back, but this is insane. And now it's national news.
Here's the thing, folks - we have been having the "Are Libraries Dead?!" debate since I started grad school. Librarians, when you do things like this: things that make us look like nervous old biddies, things that make us look naggy and mean, things that make us look like relics YOU ARE KILLING US. I mean really.
Not to mention for all of us Stephen King fans out there this is conjuring up uncomfortable memories of The Library Policeman.

Not how I want to be thought of...

So please, librarians, I'm begging you....help out the cause and don't do anything else that's going to get us put in the news for being nuts.

Why I love the internet.

2012-01-05T17:20:00.000-08:00

Okay - so, I think an important part of being a librarian is understanding technology. It's also important as a high school librarian to relate the student, to know what they're into.
This post is not about that. It's about my love for the internet. The internet has given us an absolutely insane amount of possibilities for both efficiency and screwing around. It is a big insane, frenetic, ever changing time suck. And it's impossible to explain to someone who thinks it's stupid why nayan cat is awesome and how happy autotuned crap makes me (my favorite autotune is of course, this one)
Now the reason I bring this up is because, as a nerdy blogging librarian I would be remiss if I didn't share with you my new favorite internet nonsense. Hey Girl, I Like The Library Too.
This is a chuck of awesome that consists of pictures of actor Ryan Gosling with lolcat captions about hitting on a librarian. And I effing love it. I love it so hard. I don't know how this stupid beautiful thing happened and I don't need to. I will just enjoy it.

Of course, now I have also discovered that there is a Ryan Gosling Reads Young Adult one too. Also fantastic.
Yes. Thank you Al Gore for inventing the internet so I can have this.
I would also like to mention that I had a pre-existing crush on my boyfriend Ryan Gosling ever since I discovered Dead Man's Bones - his weird/awesome band. You enjoy this nonsense I've shared with you. And this video...

You're welcome.

Book Review: The Plot Whisperer by Martha Alderson

2012-01-05T16:33:00.000-08:00

Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: Adams Media (October 15, 2011)
ISBN-10: 1440525889
ISBN-13: 978-1440525889
List Price: $8.98
I finished this book on January 2

Okay, soooo...first off, thanks to my gorgeous and talented sissy for letting me borrow this even though it was a Christmas present and you clearly didn't want me to take it.

Alright, let's get down to business: the book. It's about...well....books. Okay, I've probably checked about 15 books on writing in the last couple of years. My favorite so far is Stephen King's On Writing and to be honest, it's only 50% about writing (the other 50% is memoiry. Yeah, that's a word). The other ones? Yeah...I'm not saying I didn't read them but...I didn't finish a single one. The closest I've ever gotten to finishing a book about writing was 90 Days to Your Novel of which I probably read 3/4. Why am I telling you this? Because you should know I read this whole book cover to cover. And that's got to say something.

The book has some slightly cheesy encouragement parts and a lot of stuff about how your story fits in the "Universal Story"

The Universal Story would be more fun if there was a luck dragon in it.

But aside from that stuff the book is a solid, step-by-step plot building guide. Alderson takes you from the general story stuff to the in depth: character development, transitions, themes, all the elements you need to develop a great story out of your ideas. As in all books about writing Alderson uses several examples from classic works and popular literature. Now...I read a lot, and I will tell you, it's pretty rare that one of these books references a book I have read. This one mentioned at least two or three I had read amongst the many I had not. Gold star for me.
I think this book's advice was particularly helpful for me because of where I am in the writing process - I have finished a first draft (which is mildly terrible) and am revising. I was able to take many of the suggestions and apply them to my story.
If you're a writer, I would wait to begin this book until you have some semblance of an idea to work with before starting. If you follow the steps in the book you will end up with a crazy thorough plot diagram that looks like a rainbow threw up post-it notes on a posterboard.

And really, if you have that many post-it notes you should be doing this...

In google stalking Mrs. Alderson (like ya do) I found her crazy involved website and a shit-ton of youtube videos she's posted on plotting if you're into that sort of thing. Though, curiously, I couldn't track down one novel she's written, so....weird.
Either way: I liked this. It definitely gave me stuff to think about while I'm revising. I'll probably be featuring different parts of the book as I apply them to my writing process

Booknerd is back beyotches!

2012-01-02T19:43:00.001-08:00

Okay, clearly the blog has been on unofficial hiatus since August 2008. I've decided to dust her off and start her up again, because...well...I need to share my nerd with the world.
The blog started as a New Year's resolution back in 2007 as a way to document all the stuff I was reading. First post is here. I was in library school (yes, that's a thing) at the time and I was reading all kinds of stuff from Library textbooks (also a thing) to lots of YA to straight up trashy romance. The blog back then was pretty much straight book reviews, and then I expanded with some trailers and movie reviews and related nonsense.
Five years later I am an official librarian at a great high school that I am very lucky to work at. I am also a writer, working on my first YA novel. I still read a lot, tons of YA books, lots of Stephen King and no shortage of trashy romance novels either (don't judge me, it's called a guilty pleasure because it's pleasurable!).
Sooo...the point of the new and revamped booknerd blog is still to review books, but I'll also be writing about being a librarian, the writing process, and other nerd-tastic stuff.
Also...when I'm a shamefully famous published YA author you can be all "I knew her before she was mainstream..." etc. You'll love it.

Like this guy, only about me...whatever, you get the point.

Anyway, you're gonna love it.
Coming up next:
Book review: The Plot Whisper

Trailer: Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist

2008-08-01T14:10:00.001-07:00

Okay, I freakin loved this book and I have a major crush on Mr. Levithan (1/2 of the creator of this book). You can read my review of this book here. I also think Michael Cera (who plays Nick) is adorable and I want to bite his face so this should be good. The Norah girl is pretty so that's also nice. The trailer looks good and funny albeit like there's lots of stuff that doesn't happen in the book. The movie comes out on October 3 and here's the IMDB page.

Trailer: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

2008-07-31T10:07:00.001-07:00

Woot! While I wish there were still HP books to be excited about there aren't, so we have to make due with the movies. I love the films, but this one is going to be a bummer. This new teaser is good, and shows a less action-y magic-y side and more of the plot. So cool. Enjoy!

Movie comes out November 21 and the IMDB site is here.

The A to Z Encyclopedia of Serial Killers by Harold Schechter and David Everitt

2008-07-31T09:41:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 352 pages
Publisher: Pocket; Rev Upd edition (July 4, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1416521747
ISBN-13: 978-1416521747
List Price: $16.00
I finished this book on July 30

Okay, so I picked this book up at the end of the school year one day, meaning to just peruse it briefly. That, by the way, is the way that many of my students pick it up. It's a great D.E.A.R. book for that reason, because you can read it for 10 to 40 minutes and then put it down and never look at it again.
Anyway, I brought the stupid thing home with me and I've been reading it on and off for weeks. My boyfriend thinks it's morbid, and, of course it is. But it's interesting too. It's especially interesting if you watch as many horror movies as I do (I love 'em!).
It's set up as a traditional encyclopedia with alphabetical entries and 'see alsos' embedded in the topics. What makes it so readable is the lurid and graphic writing style. It's written in dime store novel prose that makes it seem like you're getting gossip from that neighborhood lady who knows too much about (and rejoices in) other people's misfortunes and maybe likes a nip of sherry from time to time. It's also peppered with real life pictures, reproductions of notes, and photos of serial killer trading cards. Yes, that's right, there's serial killer trading cards, showing here:As with most encyclopedias, it's not meant to be read beginning to end, which is mostly what I was doing. It becomes a bit boring and repetitive that way, so I would say just jump around to what interests you. Another reason it becomes boring is because lots of the crimes are the same. Kill some folks, rape 'em, eat 'em. There's apparently lots more necrophilia and cannibalism than I realized. So, you know...yuck. The cool part is that it really goes beyond your Bundys and your Mansons and talks about lots of icky killers that aren't as well known.
Bottom line: is it sick? Yep. But you still know you're a little interested, you dirty bird.
Soundtrack: Psycho Killer by The Talking Heads.
Please enjoy this student-film-tacular video for the song. Oh the things you find on youtube. It's a little cheesy-graphic if you're weak tummied (but if you're weak tummied, why are you reading my blog?). This video reminds me how much I can't wait for my boyfriend Dexter to come back on. Sigh...Michael C. Hall. Yum....Oh, um..yeah, the video:

Boy Toy by Barry Lyga

2008-07-31T09:16:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Hardcover: 416 pages
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin; 1 edition (September 24, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0618723935
ISBN-13: 978-0618723935
List Price: $16.95
I finished this book on July 28

Okay, so, I read Mr. Lyga's other book The Astonishing Adventures of Fanboy and Gothgirl way back when. I also saw Lyga speak and very much enjoyed his presentation on the History of Geekery. So, when this finally showed up at my library (why do book orders take so long to come in? It's like having perma-blue balls. Ugh) I knew I had to read it.
So, Josh was the victim of sexual abuse at the hands of his female teacher when he was 12. Very Mary Kay Letourneau. Anyway, the abuse eventually comes out and the story follows the life of an older Josh, who is still dealing with (or not so much dealing with) his abuse. High school Josh is applying to colleges and trying to get a baseball scholarship. He is also trying to repair a fractured relationship with his former b/f and possible love interest. Oh, and his parents are douches. And he thinks he is a sex-pervert and that the abuse was his fault. Oh, one more thing: his abuser is getting out of prison. Frickin awesome. As if this kid doesn't have enough problems.
This abuse in the story is told little by little in flashbacks, it's honest and frank, but it isn't kitty porn. The guilty party is a 24-year-old teacher. This really skeeved me out because she's obviously bonkers and I'm a 25-year-old high school teacher and I can't even fathom how this happens. The cool thing about the book is that it isn't just about this abuse, it's really more about Josh's life now and how his past is influencing his present. It was all really artfully handled, really. Josh's character is well written and the story wraps up pretty nicely. Oh, and the baseball stuff wasn't too much for a non-jock like me to handle. It was actually pretty well done. I followed it and I was interested. All in all I think I like this one better than Fanboy and I will continue to keep an eye out for Lyga.
Sountrack: Hot for Teacher by Van Halen. Because it's totally inappropriate and there's nothing funny about this book book's abuse. And I love inappropriatness (and making up words).

The Turning by Gillian Chan

2008-07-22T09:02:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 200 pages
Publisher: Kids Can Press, Ltd. (January 10, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1553375769
ISBN-13: 978-1553375760
List Price: $6.95
I finished this book on July 20

So, okay. I'm a librarian. I successfully find books for high school students to read on a regular basis. I work my ass off at it. Usually I do pretty good. But there's one person who always ignores my suggestions, doesn't read what I get for him or says things like "Do you even know me?" when I try to give him something. That's my pain in the bottom boyfriend. Anyway, when school ended I brought home books for me to read over the summer and he said "get some for me too" so I did (and I looked something like this). Well he read a couple and this is one that he read. It was short, so I read it too.
Here's the rub: Ben is mad. His mom died and he's moved to England (from Canada) with his heretofore absentee father Lars (awesome name, I know). Anyway, our Ben acts pretty much like he's wearing saggy diapers that leak throughout the whole book. He is deliberately terse, rude and somehow gets away with cursing out his father on a regular basis. Now you know I love salty language, but even that isn't really saving this book for me. Oh, right, the plot: there's a Green Man called Wyliff who is (rather deviously) trying to get Ben's help to best this big bad fairy who's pissing off the world (and yeah, I know "big bad fairy" sounds like an oxymoron). Anyway, tree man, plus a little guy who reminds me of a surly David the Gnome (10 points for figuring out how to reference that shit!) try to save the day. Ben makes the brilliant decision not to tell his dad/ask for help even though Lars is a folklore expert and would definitely be able to help him.
The thing is, it's not a horrible book. I didn't like the main character but it doesn't mean that it wasn't a perfectly acceptable story for the kind of reader who wants to read every fantasy ever. My boyfriend's review is: It's like OK cake. Meaning, you're never mad that you're eating cake, even if the cake wasn't that good. But in the back of your mind, you wish it was better. So, that's the story with this one. Read at your own risk.
Soundtrack: Feed the Tree by Belly. Because I love 90's alterna-rock and trees are hungry too.

Movie Trailer: Twilight

2008-07-17T18:57:00.000-07:00

Here's the newest trailer for the upcoming Twilight movie which comes out on December 12 (aka: not soon e-friggin-nough).

At first I was skeptical of Cedric Diggory as Edward but now that I see it I am happy. Kristin Stewart should be good, I liked her in Speak. Here's the other trailer that's out.

For more Twilight info the movie site is here, IMDB is here. The book site is here. And the new book comes out August 2nd. Chances that I will be going to midnight madness for that book? 100% baby.

Crank by Ellen Hopkins

2008-07-15T13:14:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Paperback: 544 pages
Publisher: Simon Pulse (October 5, 2004)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0689865198
ISBN-13: 978-0689865190
List Price: $9.99
I finished this book on July 15

So, okay, first off, this has nothing to do with that movie of the same name starring Jason Statham. Good cover, though, isn't it? If you look close you can see that the words are made up of meth, and that's the main character in this book.
You might think that our narrator: Kristina/Bree is the main character, but the true force in the story is the crystal meth she becomes addicted to. Kristina goes to visit her long lost dead beat pop and on the way becomes enamored with a boy and addicted to crank. Sucks. When she comes home you almost hope she will kick it, but you know she won't. She finds boys at home who can supply her with more drugs, and, as a party favor, rape. Good times.
The downward spiral depicted here is, imo, more jarring than Go Ask Alice because it's a bit more of a narrative story. Oh, did I mention it's written in verse? Cause it is. Hopkins stories are written in a free verse style that allows the scattered thoughts of our girl anti-hero. Also, many of the poems are readable in more than one way (up and down, left to right).
I read one of Hopkins' other books and saw her speak in person (more on that in another post) and she was funny and smart. I really liked listening to her talk about her books, how they are banned and also how they are used in many rehab programs. They are really powerful stuff. But what's most interesting to me about it is this, Crank, along with its sequel, Glass are fictionalized versions of her own family. Her daughter is Kristina/Bree. I think that is really brave. What is even more exceptional, is the way she portrays herself (through her daughter's eyes) as a 40-something career and workout obsessed not perfect mother. It's very powerful stuff to know that someone who seems as reasonable and honest as Hopkins does in person can have a daughter who is a crystal meth addict.
Moral of the story: Read this book. Also, don't google meth unless you want to see the incredibly fucked up things it does to people's faces. Yikes stripes, babies.
Soundtrack: Sanctified by Nine Inch Nails. Most people think this song is about a lady, but it's about drugs.

Duma Key by Stephen King

2008-07-15T12:45:00.000-07:00

Hardcover: 592 pages
Publisher: Scribner; Export Ed. edition (January 22, 2008)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1416552510
ISBN-13: 978-1416552512
List Price: $28.00
I finished this book on July 14

Okay, so, we know I lurve me some Stephen King. But I've come to realize that just because you love something doesn't always mean it's good. There are times when I smother my beau in the night (mostly when he beats me in Spite & Malice) and there are times when I am less than in love with a specific King story. But let me tell you, lovelies, that shit did not go down here. I devoured Duma Key in a way I haven't read anything recently. Last night I skipped going to the gym because I was nearing the end and I had to finish it.
Plotacular: Edgar Freemantle (such a King name, really) was a loaded construction guy who had a severe accident that left him minus an arm, and plus a fake hip, a bad leg and anger issues. On top of that his wife of a bajilion years says: "See ya!" and gets a divorce. Bad news bears. Edgar's will to live is fading fast and his shrink suggests a move to a new place and a return to a hobby that will make Edgar happy. So he shuffles off to a big crazy pink house on one of the Florida Keys and takes off drawing again. Drawing soon turns to painting and Edgar discovers he's eerily talented. Could it be his phanton limb pain helping him? Or his head injuries? Could it be the mysterious island he's on or it's few other occupants.
The story is riveting from the first few pages and keeps building slowly but steadily to an ending that made me skip Pilates (and I am a gal who loves Pilates). There is so much classic SK here, too. It's like putting on that big comfy cardigan that you've had forever on a chilly night and finding it just as snuggly as ever. The thing I love about his books is not only is there always an amazing story going on, but there is also a multitude of likable or intriguing characters (including one who says Jesus Krispies, which I have already added to my repertoire). This book reminds me a bit of Bag of Bones, which is one of the first books I reviewed here.
For more, go over to Amazon and watch my b/f SK discuss cooking this tale up in a little video.
Also, please enjoy a new feature: I'm the kind of person who associates music with everything and reading a book usually reminds me of several different songs for a variety of reasons. So, this is just a little extra: the song the book reminds me of.
So, for the first ever Soundtrack: Wave of Mutilation by the Pixies. Cause he's an amputee. And it's on a beach. Stop giving me that look, I don't have to explain myself to you :)

The Host by Stephanie Meyer

2008-07-08T19:48:00.000-07:00

Hardcover: 624 pages
Publisher: Little, Brown and Company; 1 edition (May 6, 2008)
ISBN-10: 0316068047
ISBN-13: 978-0316068048
Price: $25.99
I finished this book on July 8

That's right, lovelies: I'm kicking off my grand return to blogging with a goddam Seal of Approval: this stuff is good.
Okay, so: Stephanie Meyer has been very lucky thus far with her covers, and this one is also good. You can't tell from the picture but the silvery ring around her eye is reflective in real life.
The plot: imagine Invasion of the Body Snatchers from the Body Snatcher's point of view. That's more or less what's happened here. Wanderer, a silvery, feathery alien being has come to Earth after inhabiting many other planets. The invasion of Earth has been underway for a long time and assimilation is almost total. Wanderer is put into the body of a young girl named Melanie, the only problem is Melanie is still inside. And it's not all skipping and playing hopscotch and singing "Kid Sister and Me". Actually, Mel is pretty fucking pissed, and she torments Wanderer with her memories of her previous life and loved ones.
Right off the bat I was in love with the concept of this book. I liked being able to hear it from the alien point of view. But increasingly as you read it you begin to feel equally strong about both girls, and are therefore caught in the same conundrum as Wanderer. The story then takes you a long way away from the typical storylines and expectations the beginning drums up. When I was a little more than halfway through I couldn't believe we'd gotten to where we were.
The other cool part of it is that it doesn't read overly like a romance (Like Meyer's other works, which I effin love with all my heart and soul) and it doesn't really read like a scifi either, even though it's about aliens. It's really more about families, and fitting in and finding your place. Either way it's super good, and even though I called the ending pretty well ahead of time I was totally satisfied with it. And you know I love it when things turn out the way you want them to.

I'm back, bitches

2008-07-08T19:09:00.000-07:00

Okay, so here's the deal. I'm back. For real this time. Blogging starts: now. I was struggling with depression and my crohn's disease for a long time and feeling generally craptastic. But I'm better now (and on summer vacation!) and ready to deliver snarky reviews straight to your monitors. That is, if I haven't alienated those of you who used to read me :)
Anywho: the books that I have read in the interim (and yes, I have been reading) will be reviewed when I write them up and filled in over the next month or so. Promise.
But I just finished a book that's so good I have to review it.

I'm not dead

2008-04-12T18:12:00.000-07:00

Hi loyal readers (all 3 of you). Just a quick note to apologize for the grievous lack of posting lately. The truth is that I have been having some health issues and haven't been up to being witty and snarky lately. I am taking care of myself and I have been feeling better this week.
Tomorrow I am leaving to visit the half of my family that resides in Florida and when I get back next week I promise that I will begin posting again.
So, you can look forward to reviews of the books that I have read this month:
Catalyst by Laurie Halse Anderson
Uglies by Scott Westerfeld
Burned by Ellen Hopkins
Bringing up the Bones and Contents Under Pressure by Lara M. Zeises
An Abundance of Katherines by John Green

Also: the recounting of my yearly trek to the Teen Book Festival and my awesome chat with Lara M. Zeises/Lola Douglas (whom I now have a big-time crush on.)

Not to mention whatever I read in Florida (so you know I have more books than pairs of shoes in my luggage - I am such a nerd/horrible at being a girl).

See you soon, my lovelies!

Tantalize by Cynthia Leitich Smith

2008-03-16T11:41:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Hardcover: 336 pages
Publisher: Candlewick (February 13, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0763627917
ISBN-13: 978-0763627911

Okay, so here's the thing. Guilty pleasure are supposed to be pleasurable. Tantalize has all the makings of being a pretty hot teen vampire read. Except somewhere in here things fall short.
Quincy (yeah, short for Quincy Morris. From Dracula. Not even a girl's name. also from Texas. uck.) is a senior in high school with a (half) werewolf as a best friend/secret love interest. Like ya do. Anyway, apparently they live in some world where everyone knows about werepeople and vampires and they live in some kind of uneasy truce like in X-men. (Coincidentally, were = man so werepeople is manpeople? boo.)
So Quincy's fam owns a restaurant but now the only surviving family members are her and her passive aggressive Uncle. They are remodeling the place to be Sanguini's (get it?) a vampire themed restaurant. And the chef dies at the last minute and they need a new one and of course Quincy is the one to train him/oversee his vampire routine and creation of the menu.
In short order Quincy adopts a skipping school problem almost as serious as her shiny new drinking problem. She also alienates her were-boyfriend and develops an uneasy crush on the dockers-wearing blond cook who she's supposed to be turning into a vampire chef.
This ends, I'm sure you could guess with Quincy tied up in the bonds of some vamps. There are the makings of some good stuff here, but it all goes kind of flat somewhere around the addition of baby squirrel to the menu and Quincy donning a crazy lady dom outfit.
Not a fan of the characters in here so much, and there's nothing really sexy going on although it really seems like there should be (with a title like Tantalize....just sayin'). Oh, jebus, I forgot to tell you. None of the other werepeople turn into anything cool. Here's a thought for you: were-armadillo. Not Sexy! I want to hit this book's nose with a rolled up newspaper and say "Bad book! No were-armadillo! Bad!"
Here's the thing: I was hoping this would be some nice filler until I can read about Edward and Bella again, but it only made me miss them more. le sigh.

The Schwa Was Here by Neal Shusterman

2008-03-04T18:07:00.000-08:00

Paperback: 228 pages
Publisher: Puffin (March 2, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0142405779
ISBN-13: 978-0142405772
List Price: $6.99
I finished this book on Feb. 2

I somehow have never read anything by Neal Shusterman before, though I just got in a bunch of his books in our most recent order. So, I thought I'd give this one a try.
Our narrator, Antsy, tells us the funny and tragic story of the Schwa. Okay, actually, the Schwa's story isn't funny, but Antsy is. He speaks in annoying-ish Brooklynese, but it's not so annoying you're mad at him. Mostly, he's funny. Anyway, the Schwa: he's this kid who's invisiblish. The Schwa takes the normal easy to miss loner kid thing to new territories, there are times when he's in front of folks and they can't see him. His past is as shady as his present, and his mother (according to town legend) either disappeared, or was killed and her body was mailed to all 50 states (ouch).
Antsy, the Schwa and some secondary pals set out to find the limits of the Schwa Effect. It's all pretty impressive until they get big time busted and pull dog walking duty for the town recluse. This of course (because it is a YA novel) changes their lives. There is loving, losing, and truth-telling that is pretty realistic, actually.
Good plot, interesting characters and extra points for a cover that I keep looking at and seeing characters (oh, that's Ira! look, Manny Bullpucky's severed head!). The story was apparently optioned to Disney in 2006 but I don't think anything's come of it yet. Truthfully, I feel the story might be better if kept in book form. But that's just me.
Also: I wish other people would read this so I could call attribute things to The Schwa Effect, because that's pretty BA.

Spinx by Robin Cook

2008-03-02T14:30:00.000-08:00

Paperback: 320 pages
Publisher: Signet (July 10, 2001)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0451159497
ISBN-13: 978-0451159496

Alright, I know the cover image looks awful, but I had to search out this masterpiece of 80's intrigue for you to see (or for me to criticize). First, shafts of light in the dark = mood lighting. Next, please note our main character's total mom jeans and windblown 80's mop top. She's also totally running like a girl (cause she's in danger, eep!). Next, there is the Arab looking Dracula in either a mirror or a sarcophagus who is supposed to look like Frank Langella and actually kinda does.
Anyway, moving on. I read this because someone I really like and respect gave it to me. This might have been good in 1979 when it was written (and before I was born) but it does not hold up today. Alright: Egyptologist Erica Barron goes to Egypt for the first time by herself and then tries her hardest to win the Darwin Award. Somehow Erica ends up involved in a black market conspiracy involving a Seti I statue and murder (insert dramatic music here: dun dun duuuun!). Also she meets two different older men (with hot 80's chest hair, and as a bonus, one is French) who are clearly both using her for different things. Also there's lots of people following her and she almost gets killed a lot. A ton of other dudes die in her immediate presence and this does not seem strange to her nor does it cause the police to want to jail her in any way. Weird. Oh, and there's a guy who she was dating back in America who they keep cutting to and it's very annoying. He's the worst subplot of all time. So, yeah, there are three potential beaus and not one graphic sex scene. boo!
Also, lots of stuff in here seems vaguely racist, but I have a hunch that it wasn't so bad at the time it was written. This is one of those books where you keep wondering what the characters are thinking (and not in a good way) and then they do the dumbest thing next and all you can do is shake your head.
Oh! And did you know Robin Cook was a dude? And a doctor? And handsome? Moral of the story? Maybe he should have stuck to medical thrillers.
And, cause I know you're interested: here's the movie info (though I caution you that the reviews for that are worse than this one)

Movie Trailer: Coraline

2008-02-25T19:33:00.000-08:00

I reviewed this book, here.
I really liked it and this trailer is very promising. I hope it is as good an adaptation as Stardust was (read my book review for that or the movie review).
Here's the film's IMDB page.
p.s. it's blurry because it's in 3D and this is a bootleg.

(3d always makes me think of weird al. sweet!)

The Prophet of Yonwood by Jeanne DuPrau

2008-02-25T18:43:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Paperback: 304 pages
Publisher: Yearling (May 8, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0440421241
ISBN-13: 978-0440421245
List Price: $6.99
I finished this book on Feb. 22

Okay, so: good covers, increasingly less cool stories. Seriously: you read this whole book before you even know how it fits into the series.
This is the story of what happens before the "end" of the world that results in the creation of Ember. Nickie and her aunt come to Yonwood to clean out and sell an old family estate. Nickie has three goals: 1. Keep Greenhaven (the estate) 2. Fall in love (p.s. she's like 11) 3. Help the world (oh yeah, the world is in on the brink of war - and the 11 year old can fix it).
So, here's why this book annoyed me. Lots of stuff was unrealistic. First off: what kind of aunt is in the care of their niece and lets her get into major trouble and is so inattentive she doesn't even know the girl is hiding a dog. In their house. Also: religious crazies. They make me furious in real life and even more angry when people actually listen to them in books. That's what's going on in Yonwood. Everyone has taken a dose of the god crazies. Seriously, the whole town. Mike Huckabee would be jealous (he kind of looks like a walleye pug pup, no?).
Anyway, major shenanigans ensue and then everything is cleared up in a few pages at the end. It's like super speed round denouement. Seriously, I felt my hair ruffle as the end came speeding at me out of nowhere.
So, out of this series my favorite is the first, and though these are great for younger kiddos I think I'm over them.

The People of Sparks by Jeanne DuPrau

2008-02-25T17:48:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Paperback: 352 pages
Publisher: Yearling (April 12, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0375828257
ISBN-13: 978-0375828256
List Price: $5.99
I finished this book on Feb. 20

This is the sequel to The City of Ember, and it follows the story of the people of Ember after they escape the underground city into the real world. On the plus side: they have escaped from a dying city which was running out of electricity and supplies. The bummer: it's a post apocalyptic world and it kind of sucks to never have been outside in the sun and heat before.
So, our pilgrims find themselves in the city of Sparks, one of the only fledgling cities of survivors that is finally starting to prosper. The town decides that they have to take in the residents of Ember, which about doubles their population. This, of course, puts a huge strain on the resources and tolerance of the people of Sparks. Eventually, tensions rise, until there is a confrontation between the two peoples.
What is cool about this story is how well DuPrau tells both sides of the story. You can really feel for both the citizens of Sparks and the Emberites. Also, there are jerky people on both sides of the fight and cool people. Eventually things are wrapped up with a neat bow, as you'd expect. This is a very middle school moral of the story kind of book. Predictable for me, but perfect for young readers.
Here's my thing, though: I know why they didn't want the people in Ember to know about the outside world. But...why keep it a secret from the world once it's over and done with? The people of Sparks don't even believe them...ever. Very annoying and implausible, I feel. There is one lame nursery rhyme meant to remind people, but even that is misinterpreted. I feel I would have left some info, maybe a general game plan for re-entry. Just sayin...

Looking for Alaska by John Green

2008-02-10T18:11:00.000-08:00

Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: Puffin (December 28, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0142402516
ISBN-13: 978-0142402511
List Price: $7.99
I finished this book on Feb. 9

Okay, I will give you the shortest review of this book ever so that I may talk about what's really pissing me off: the shenanigans surrounding it right now.
Review: Miles asks his parents to go to a boarding school so he may search for the "Great Perhaps." Miles collects famous last words (awesome). He meets a diminutive boy with anger management issues (The Colonel) and a gorgeous free spirit (Alaska) who is the kind of girl boys like Miles fall in love with in books like these. What makes it unique is that the characters are amazing and interesting and flawed. Reading Miles' thought provoking essay at the end is enough of a gift to take away with you and you're just lucky you get to have the rest of the book. It's beautiful and sad and important and that's all I'm going to say because you should just go read it.
The shenanigans: It began with me seeing this:

First of all: that's big time bad ass. Huge. I, of course, 100% agree with this and I am rightly fired up over it. Also: Depew is in my neighborhood-ish but no, I couldn't go to the meeting (which is probly a good thing, because I believe I would have been kicked out due to cursing at people or thrown up because this makes me so angry I could puke).
Go here to read the write up of the meeting in the Buffalo News (this link won't be good forever because the archives aren't free). Seriously: the cancer quote makes me want to stab out that guy's eyes and piss in his ocular cavity.
Yes, there is swearing it the book. There is swearing in shitty rap music too, and I promise the kids listen to that. Yes, there is talk of a blowjob. I personally do not think the scene in question is that graphic and Mr. Green is correct in saying that it is not in the least titillating.
I work in a high school and I have ears. Therefore I think I am qualified to say that the things they say to each other are a hundred times more obnoxious than anything printed here. And I know plenty of them who would benefit from/appreciate/love this book. Kids are smarter than we think, folks, and pretending they aren't is a shitty plan (and yes, the view is nice from my soapbox, thanks).
Not to mention that this book is an ALA Printz award winne r and that they actually hand out teaching guides to go along with them (though they contain hateful spoilers).
In searching more for info about John Green I have discovered that his awesomery goes even further. Exhibit one: his website. Cool links to anagrams, book info and his blog. You should stop reading this blog and add his to your RSS feeds. Go ahead, I'll wait. Exhibit two: Nerdfighters, and Brotherhood 2.0. Brotherhood 2.0 is a year long vlog exchange between Green and his brother (Oddly, I had heard his brother's Accio Deathly Hallows before and not known the story behind it). This vlog also inspired an entry into Urban Dictionary, another badge of coolness. DFTBA, which means, "Don't forget to be awesome."
Extra thanks to Eli for letting me in on all of this via Twitter :)
Moral of this blog:
I loved Looking for Alaska, and I have a crush on John Green. Also: book banners can suck my balls.

The City of Ember by Jeanne DuPrau

2008-02-10T17:47:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Paperback: 270 pages
Publisher: Yearling (May 25, 2004)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0375822747
ISBN-13: 978-0375822742
List Price: $5.99
I finished this book on Feb. 8th

This is the first book in a series for middle schoolers. I bought it at a mega sale over the summer and it's been sitting around chatting with other books in the "To Be Read" pile for a while now. I decided it was time to dust it off (literally) and give it a go.
The book is based in the post-apocalyptic underground City of Ember. It seems that the city was built and set up with stores of food and electricity and the people of the city forgot over time what the real world is like. They are left with one set of instructions to get out after what would presumably be a good amount of time for the world to become safe again (250 years).
We meet our heroine, 12-year-old Lina Mayfleet on "Assignment Day" at school. This is the day where they effectively graduate from formal education and are randomly assigned a job (which totally sucks). Lina wants to be a messenger and, of course, pulls the crappy job of pipeworker. Doone, a social upstart who wants to save the failing city pulls messenger and is annoyed. So, you guessed it, they pull the old switcheroo.
Next Lina finds a piece of paper which seems to detail something important, but has been munched on by her baby sister. It is, of course, the instructions for getting out of the city. The problem is, no one knows they are supposed to be looking for it. She and Doon set out to decipher the broken message and save the day.
The idea of the underground city is cool. They have greenhouses, but most of their supplies come from storehouses and of course, the canned good and lightbulbs are rapidly depleting. Which brings me to another point. It's hard for us to imagine a world that's entirely dark but that's how this place is. It is lit only by overhead lights and at night instead of dusk and sunset it just goes dark at lights out. Yikes. Also: the power is failing. And there are occasional blackouts. Can you imagine? During these blackouts the lights are off completely and everything is pitch dark. Here that's not the case, even when there is a blackout there are still stars, there's still the moon, but these people live in fear that the lights will go out forever and that will be it. For some reason, they haven't figured out candles. (Lame).
The story is interesting and creative and the characters are good. The reading level is low, so I'm sure it would be very easy for this to be read by the 9 year olds that Amazon suggests. This series is very popular in the elementary and middle schools that I've seen. Here's a few links to some lesson plans for the book: Random House reader's guide, or the Teacher's @ Random teaching guide.
Oh, and it's going to be a movie with Bill Murray. I just got my paws on the rest of the series so you can expect those reviews soon.

Book Meme

2008-02-05T16:41:00.000-08:00

The Vampire Librarian (who I have a nerd-crush on) had a meme on her blog which I have (stolen) volunteered to re-post. Mostly because I have a book on my desk, and it's the next one I'll be reviewing so it's like a little sneak peek.

Rules:

1. Pick up the nearest book (of at least 123 pgs.)
2. Open the book to page 123
3. Find the fifth sentence
4. Post the next three sentences
5. Tag five people

This is from City of Ember by Jeanne DuPrau

"Mostly insects," said Doon. He told her about his collection of drawings and the worm he was currently observing.
To Lina, this sounded far less interesting than an undiscovered city, but she didn't say so.

I'm not gonna be presumptuous and tag people, so if you're interested let me know in the comments and I'll link to you.

Update:
My babe Bridget is in :)

The Battle of Jericho by Sharon M. Draper

2008-02-04T16:59:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Mass Market Paperback: 352 pages
Publisher: Simon Pulse (December 28, 2004)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0689842333
ISBN-13: 978-0689842337
List Price: $6.99
I finished this book on Feb. 2

Alright. Draper is a big name in YA lit. She writes urban realistic fiction and has won awards. This book is a Coretta Scott King winner. Here's the thing, I'm sure it's wonderful for a certain group of my students. The ones who like Walter Dean Myers would certainly like this book. And, truthfully, any student who told me they were going to pledge a frat in college would get this book from me. But me, personally? I just wasn't that into it.
First, aesthetically, I hate it. I don't like the cover, what is that? A kid in a Cosby sweater running away? Also: in addition to the Dr. Huxtable sweater, he's wearing a Denim Tuxedo. Ouch. Also: it's in Arial font. Hate! What kind of book is in a sans-serif font? Yuck. Also, on the first page of each chapter the words start over at the left of the page and sort of make a tricky triangle shape down to the normal spot. It's weird. And annoying.
Second: the dialog. Obviously I'm pathetically white and unhip, but these lines seem weak even to me. Examples: "Aw, quit dissin' yourself." and "You just jealous 'cause when the girls try to put their arms around you, they think they're grabbing a skinny old pencil instead!" Ohh, burn. Seriously, uber pwnage. The last person to use old as an adjective like that was Holden Caulfield. Only, you know, he was cool. And there's no swearing. I'm sure Draper did this so that the book was, I dunno, acceptable...but the truth is, kids swear. And something about this trash talk seems unbelievable to me.
Anyway, the story: Jericho and his cousin/best mate Josh and their pal Kofi are recruited to pledge for this cult/club/frat The Warriors of Distinction (which I kept reading as the Warriors of Destruction, which is cooler, and also conjures images of West Side Story-like knife fights. When you're a jet...) So there is hazing. Oh, and there's also a kick ass female, Dana, who tricks them into letting her pledge even though they've never let a girl in before. One of the members is an unstable date-rapist kinda guy who has a thing for her and gives her about ten tons more shit than anyone else. Truly, besides the things that happen to Dana, the pledge stuff is pretty tame (except they are made to steal stuff) until the end, when of course, tragedy ensues.
Here's some of the things that bug me. Dana was a real badass, but I wanted to see a "Suck my dick" G.I. Jane moment, or at least one where the other Warriors made that douche stop picking on her so bad. Also, the girl that Jericho is interested is a weird character with like, no personality, she's very one dimensional. And, Jericho is a trumpet player and misses the chance of his life to pledge and there is little fallout from that. Also: after the tragedy the parents are all offended. Why didn't someone watch them...etc. Um, why didn't you watch them? I hate that the parents expected someone else to be taking care of their kids instead of finding out what was going on. Also: I thought the wrap up was too quick. It was like 275 pages of buildup --> tragedy --> end. Lame. I would have liked the book to explore more what happened after the events on the last night of pledging.
Like I'm saying, this is not a bad book, it's certainly one I think students should read. It has some good characters, and a strong message. I'm just saying I wasn't crazy about it myself. Shrug.

Memoirs of a Teenage Amnesiac by Gabrielle Zevin

2008-02-03T12:44:00.000-08:00

Hardcover: 288 pages
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux (BYR) (August 21, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0374349460
ISBN-13: 978-0374349462
List Price: $17.99
I finished this book on Feb. 1

After reading Zevin's Elsewhere, which I was in love with I was dying to read more of her stuff. When this came in at my library I was very excited, and thanks to a snow day last week, I read it in one day.
Here goes: Naomi (the second Naomi in a month, but I can't spell it anyway) looses a coin toss, goes back for an expensive camera and takes an epic spill down her high school's front steps. Head wound = amnesia. She can't remember anything that happened since 6th grade. This includes but it not limited to: her parents divorce (and subsequently not speaking to her mother or ever meeting her new sister), her best friend, the first time she had sex, and the fact that she kept a psychotic food diary (and probably had an eating disorder).
The players: When she has her accident a mysterious soap-opera quality brooder is there to call the ambulance, he's James. The best friend that she doesn't remember, Will, a Duckie-esque nerd boy who makes her plentiful CD mixes. Ace, douche name to go with a douchy tennis jock (yeah, tennis) who was Naomi's bf and former teen sex partner. From the get go it's obvious that 1. she can't stand Ace (neither can I) 2. Will is in love with her and 3. She digs on James, who is obviously cuckoo for cocoa puffs. Angst, fighting and self discovery, as I'm sure you can imagine, surely ensues.
It's a neat idea to imagine how you would perceive your life if you woke up and didn't remember it. Would you think your friends were assholes? Would you think you were an asshole? Very cool. Zevin certainly makes the most of the idea and even though I wasn't in love with Naomi as a character I really liked her story. I think Zevin's strength is that her characters are very realistic. They have good sides and bad sides and they are very honest.
While this traded the magic of Elsewhere for a more realistic drama I really liked this book. And, since I tend to trip a lot, now I'm all concerned that I'm going to loose my memory. Oy vay.

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

2008-01-30T19:01:00.000-08:00

Mass Market Paperback: 288 pages
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing (October 11, 1988)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0446310786
ISBN-13: 978-0446310789
List Price: $6.99
I finished this book on Jan. 31

Okay, as we know, I have not read a lot of the "classics". In fact, those of you who have been reading since last year know that the point of this blog was for me to explore books from the Modern Library's top 100 list. Obviously I have given that up to live in hedonistic bookslut sin with ya books, trash and gay porn. Either way, I never read Mockingbird and one of the English classes at my school is beginning a unit on it. Since I said "Let me know if you need any help" when the teacher mentioned it, I figured I better read it. And I was pleasantly surprised.
So, the back cover of the edition I had said something about how librarians had voted this the best book ever. I'm not saying this is the best book ever, but I liked it. I liked Scout, and her father, and her story. I was appropriately annoyed by the outcome of the trail and I liked the events toward the end of the book and the denouement. I found Scout's narration to be easy to read and fun to get into. I liked that she was a tomboy and that she had to dress up like a ham. I have a feeling that if all the classics were narrated by a little girl they might all be easier to read.
Oh, and so many good supporting characters! By the end of the book you felt like you'd been really hanging out in Maycomb with all those people. I liked Calpurnia the best, but also Miss Maudie.
Fun fact: according to SparkNotes, Harper Lee based the character of Dill on Truman Capote. Interesting (Mr. Burns impression). Also: cool lesson plans for this book here. Other bio info for Ms. Lee here.

Crush by Carrie Mac

2008-01-30T18:25:00.000-08:00

Hardcover: 106 pages
Publisher: Orca Book Publishers (May 15, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1551435217
ISBN-13: 978-1551435213
List price: $14.99
I finished this book on Jan. 29

So, okay. Here's the thing. I'm bee and I'm an internet addict. I know this, anyone who's met me knows this (and anyone reading this is probably one too.) The other day at work the internet went down like 25 minutes before quitting time. Nightmare. This book was sitting on my desk and so I started reading it. There you have it.
The book was sitting on my desk because it is part of the Orca Soundings collection and I am going to create a display of them soon. Orca books are specifically designed to be appealing to kids and cover a wide range of hot topics. They are very low reading level, short and use simple vocab. They are, in other words, what we in the business call hi/lo (high interest/low reading level). Their topics range from graffiti to sports to crime to drugs and even prostitutes (that word makes me think of this: funniest song about hookers ever!) So, because I send kids away with them all the time I thought I should probably read one. (Leave it to your girl bee to find the only one about lesbians).
So, yeah. Lesbians. Hope is a hippie kid who grew up in a commune with hemp wearing, no meat eating, madly in love with each other parents. They ship her off to NYC to hang with her druggie, bitchy model sister when they decide to go on an anniversary trip. In short order she meets a young mother who wants to take her in as a nanny (and is, shockingly, a lesbian) and a pretty girl. She is crushing on the pretty girl and of course this raises the "Am I gay?" questions and Hope is pretty freaked out. In a matter of 106 pages our Hope is out and proud and kissing on the dreadlocked object of her affections. Being that it is short and a low reading level, the novel sort of works itself out like a Babysitters Club book or something, except I don't think the BSC ever outed anyone. There are lots of plot holes and of course all of Hope's problems wrap up painfully easy (not to mention how the problem that the girls live in two different states is never addressed). But I'm not mad, this is all more or less to be expected.
Reading this was like a jolly rancher: It's sweet and strong, over quick and leaves a vaguely weird taste in your mouth (don't worry, it doesn't turn your tongue green). I'm glad we have them and I think they are good for reluctant readers. Just as long as you don't pick them up expecting Shakespeare.

Wide Awake by David Levithan

2008-01-17T17:14:00.001-08:00

Hardcover: 240 pages
Publisher: Knopf Books for Young Readers (September 12, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0375834664
ISBN-13: 978-0375834660
List Price: $16.95
I finished this book on Jan. 16

An Open Letter to David Levithan
Dear Mr. Levithan,
Please figure out how to make the beautiful things you write turn into real life. If even half of the things that happen in your books existed in real life (like acceptance, Sound of Music Drag Reviews or Infinite Darlene) the world would be a much cooler place. Please get on top of that stat.
Thank you,
The Management (bee)

Seriously: I effin love this man. He is magic. If DL were to somehow meet and create an intellectual love child with Francesca Lia Block I would experience a joygasm of epic proportions.
Oh, plot? Okay. In the future: First gay Jewish president is voted in ---> election contested ---> the people make a stand. That's all you get. Effing read it.
What is so amazing here are the characters. Jimmy and Duncan are a sweet gay couple with an amazing group of friends that the story centers around. Levithan always has these amazing characters that might be floating off in the peripheral of the story that you're like dying to have lunch with. For me, in this story, it's Gus. He says some amazing things, I love the way he speaks. Also: there is a young man who hates his parents (because they won't let him be Jewish) who unleashes a hilarious tirade on how they are the apotheosis of suck. Love. It. Oh, also: a boy named Sue and his transsexual dad. Oh! And someone says that someone else is "rainbow sprinkles" I frocking love that! I wish someone would say that about me.
So, yeah, this got a seal of approval from me, and I would give it two if I could. I told like six people about how much I loved this today, totally unsolicited. I believe that when you are a librarian you are allowed to be a crazy person about books you like. Either way, you can look forward to more DL book reviews because I have ordered all his books for the library.

The Sweet Far Thing by Libba Bray

2008-01-15T18:38:00.001-08:00

Hardcover: 832 pages
Publisher: Delacorte Books for Young Readers (December 26, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0385730306
ISBN-13: 978-0385730303
List Price: $17.99
I finished this book on Jan. 14

You may remember that I read the others in this series and have been eagerly awaiting this book for some time now. Also, let me say that these book have the coolest titles and covers. Double extra points and a cherry on top for Ms. Bray. To catch up, read my reviews of the other two books: here and here.
So: in the last book our heroine, Gemma, bound the magic of the realms to herself and promised to make an allegiance with the other forest folk. Let me stop here and tell you a story: the other night by b/f and I went grocery shopping and while I was picking out lean cuisines he threw a frozen pumpkin pie in the cart. Me: "What's that for?" Him: "Our faces." What he really meant was we were going to cook a whole pie, not offer any to our pals, and hoard it and eat it like the dirty pie sluts we are. Selfish pie. Cause you know if you start offering it out then it's gone before you know it and then...no pie. Do you see where I'm going with this? That's right, Gem begins to feel less and less like sharing. Other characters in this book work hard to gain Gemma's good graces by being completely untrustworthy. Not to mention that out of all the nogoodnicks to choose from Gemma picks the worst (Circe, the big bad from the previous book who is now imprisoned) to seek help from and she gives her power. Boo! Another boo? One of my favorite characters totally bites it. Balls. Also: things don't necessarily go the way you think they will in the end, but either way it's satisfying.
On the plus side: there is kissing with Kartik (mmm, forbidden Indian...nutritious and delicious.) Also, the girls seek to create lives for themselves outside of the narrow roles that their culture expects them to play. I love this. Someone becomes an actor. Oh! And someone comes out of the wardrobe (worst gay related - historical fiction joke ever? the world may never know). Hint: it might be someone who is very beautiful and who you thought only loved herself. So, with making one of the characters gay Ms. Bray has successfully covered all teen "problem novel" issues plus written a fantastic historical fiction/fantasy series that is not only deep and beautiful but it looks great on a shelf. Well done. I say: seal of approval to you!
p.s. this is my 100th book review on this site. thanks for reading!

The Tarot Cafe Volume 1 &2 by Sang-sun Park

2008-01-15T18:06:00.000-08:00

Volume 1:

Paperback: 184 pages

Publisher: TokyoPop (March 8, 2005)

Language: English
ISBN-10: 1595325557
ISBN-13: 978-1595325556
List Price: $9.99

Volume 2:

Paperback: 184 pages
Publisher: TokyoPop (June 7, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1595325565
ISBN-13: 978-1595325563
List Price: $9.99

First off: my new puppy ate one of these books, which is awful. We won't be repeating that mistake again. In any event: Viggo says they are tasty.
So: this is a fairly popular comic book series. Basically you have Pamela, who has crazy hair, tells fortunes and runs the cafe. She happens to tell fortunes to a hodge podge of different folks: like a dude who's really a cat. Or a blind male model/vampire. So, what you really have is little vignettes of their stories framed by Pammy in the cafe.
The vignette I liked the best was in the first book with the vampire dude. He keeps finding his true love over again and then offing her sister. I hate when that happens. There is also a cool one about a puppet master who's boy puppet falls in love with him. Please enjoy a visual sample, here:

The next book has a little more about Pamela and there's also a werewolf boy, which is cool. I can see how this is popular with the tweeny girls cause it has some dark ideas/themes plus fantasy fun. Here's one thing, now: anime male characters are often very pretty but these guys are downright beautiful (and they might be wearing lip gloss. strawberry lip gloss) and I often had to use context clues and dialog to make sure I knew the sex of the character. See, check out cat boy, pretty, huh? I wish my lips were that full. Either way, it's something I found funny and a little odd. Boys will have to be pretty secure in their masculinity to dig on this as much as the female of the species.
If you lurve this series you can join a fan group here. Also, here's the TokyoPop webpage, if you want to check out similar manga.

Blogoversary!

2008-01-03T16:39:00.000-08:00

That's right, guys and ghouls, it's been one hot sexy year of blogging for this booknerd.
Also, remember how I did a 50 book recap? Well, after this post my next review will bring it up to 99 books in a year. Not too shabby.
I started the blog last year as a way for me to keep track of what I've read. I wanted to be able to look back and see, and I honestly didn't think anyone would read it. So, thanks, my lovelies.
Some fun facts:

I have read 26527 pages this year.
I have given the bee seal of approval 9 times.
The biggest tags on my tag cloud are: Supernatural and YA
Many of the books I read since the 50 book benchmark are series, for example: His Dark Materials, The Twilight Saga, the Abhorsen Trilogy, and of course, Harry Potter.
I added a tag called "In which I claim to be dating someone famous" because I like to say that people are my boyfriend all the time. Here's the ranking on that so far: Stephen King - wins it with 5 times. Trent Reznor - 2. Snape/Alan Rickman - 3. Tim Curry - 1. Laurie Halse Anderson - 1. My actual real life boyfriend? Yeah, I mentioned him once. Only to tell you that he's a slower reader than me. Pwned!

In addition: I have been contacted by two different authors of books I've reviewed this year. Because I am fucking awesome. Who are they? Guess. Seriously. Okay, I'll tell you. Laura M. Zeises commented on my review of her book: here. Graham Joyce sent me a meebo message and friended me on myspace (I'm basically goddamn famous). This gave me major warm fuzzies and a hugely big head. I'm now sitting around and waiting for SK or Mr. Gaiman to waltz on by and ask me to tea (or not).

Also, please enjoy another booknerd recap feature: What keywords brought you here? The following are keywords people used and ended up here. Last time there were lots more sex ones, seems I'm loosing my touch, or, people are getting better at finding internet porn.

wikipedia warm fuzzies (aw)
whats cher doing lately does she have a boyfriend (i dunno, but she's probly not gonna date you)
invisible man movie sex (huh? perv. i think)
sexy indian
dark witchraft (spooky)
sexy lines stephen king books (heehee)
sexy male pictures
rebels rape pretty girls (yucko)

So, Merry New Year, my darlings, and thank you for reading. Please allow me to suggest some resolutions for you: add booknerd to your RSS feeds. Tell a friend about this kickass blog. Comment on booknerd. Talk to bee on meebo (cause she's nice!)
Seriously, thanks for reading.
Cheers!

P.S. the nerdy cake images are from a blog post, here. If you're interested in baking me a cake I would like a Labyrinth theme cake, please and thank you (Bridget, I'm looking at you).

Someday This Pain Will be Useful to You by Peter Cameron

2007-12-30T09:22:00.000-08:00

Hardcover: 240 pages
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux (BYR) (September 18, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0374309892
ISBN-13: 978-0374309893
List Price: $16.99
I finished this book on Dec. 28

The title of this book comes from an Ovid quote: "Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you." I like the title, and I like the cover. It was one of the books in our new order and it intrigued me.
In this book our hero is James, who lives in NYC and works in his mother's gallery. He is a probably gay, antisocial genius. He's been accepted to Brown (didn't get into Yale) but of course he doesn't want to go. Supporting characters include his sister: Gillian (with a hard G) who is having an affair with a married professor, James' mother who is just coming off her third divorce and runs the gallery where James works. James' grandmother, Nanette, is the only family member who he can relate to. In fact, she is the only person who actually makes sense.
James has a crush on one of his older co-workers at the gallery and he sort of fakes the guy out and is accused of sexual harassment. Oh, and he's in therapy. And his therapist is kind of lame and the sessions don't seem to really go anywhere.
One neat thing about this book is that James is obsessed with vocabulary and proper usage of grammar. He is very concerned about expressing things properly, and I love this. (Remember how sexy I think good vocab is?)
Firstly: this book reminds me a lot of Catcher in the Rye. Young man has to face facts, make a decision regarding school. He has one family member whom he relates to and loves. And, accordingly, I feel about it the way I feel about that book. I liked it, I was on board. However, it was a quiet story and I am sort of looking for more in a book. Like explosions, you know? Or sex. Either way I liked the character and the prose, so all in all I'm a fan.
Anyway, here's Peter Cameron's site. I would definitely be interested in reading something else of his. If you want to read the first chapter of this book, go here. (Coincidentally, that's why I took this home like an eager puppy, because I peeked at the first few pages.)

Naomi and Ely's No Kiss List by David Levithan and Rachel Cohn

2007-12-27T12:05:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Hardcover: 240 pages
Publisher: Knopf Books for Young Readers (August 28, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0375844406
ISBN-13: 978-0375844409
List Price: $16.99
I finished this book on Dec. 24

So, okay: this is the new to me book from David Levithan and Rachel Cohn, who wrote Nick and Norah and who fucking rock. I was very excited when this came in at my library right before Christmas. Also: remember last spring when I went to that young adult book fair and I saw Mr. Levithan speak? He read a chapter of this then, saying that he probly shouldn't because it wasn't published yet etc. and he read it substituting the word "frock" for "fuck" which is also awesome. So, yeah, I lurve him.
Anyway, try this on for size: Naomi and Ely are these hot toddies living in NYC and they have been best friends/soul mates for just about ever. Except, Naomi is in love with Ely who is gay (insert Nelson Muntz Ha Ha here). Anywho, the pair have a No Kiss List in place to ensure against a N and E breakup, which includes a few random hotties they both know. Naomi is currently dating Bruce the Second (cause he's the second boy she's dated named Bruce. God, I love them) but she's not really into him, she's more biding her time until Ely realizes maybe he wants her instead of the cock. Either way shenanigans ensue when Ely kisses Bruce the Second. Naomi is really more hurt because she realizes Ely will never love her that way than because of the adulterous making out. This starts a huge fight/drama/journey of awesomery.
This is written in alternating chapters as was N&N but the cool thing is: it's not just Ely and Naomi talking, it's lots of people. Aside from there being two Bruces (I always think of this Bruce when I hear that name, btw) there are two Robins (one is from Schenectady) a chihuahua and lots of insomniacs. Lots of different people have a say in this story and somehow all of their mini dramas and points of view add up to one very well told story. I totally didn't know which author was writing which chapter when I was reading it and was amazed that they both shared writing the same characters. Fucking rad. Naomi's chapters have these little symbols instead of words sometimes, which I thought was cooler in theory than in the execution.
To read an interview with the authors: go here. Or check out their websites go here for Levithan's and here for Cohn's.
The cool thing about this book is it speaks to so many different kinds of relationships and contains problems everyone can relate too. Also, the main characters share sparkly belts. I'm in frocking love :)

Inkheart by Cornelia Funke

2007-12-24T09:30:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Audio CD
Publisher: Listening Library (Audio); Unabridged edition (August 23, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0307282279
ISBN-13: 978-0307282279
List Price: $50.00
I finished listening to this audio book on Dec. 22

I always think it's funny when you listen to a book on tape read by a woman and they do the voices. Lynn Redgrave read this and she was amazing, her voices and accents were outstanding. However, many times, when women try to do men they sound like old men because the woman does the voice gruffly to distinguish it from her own. The reason I'm telling you this is because I imaged Mo to be much older than Brendan Frasier who will play him in the movie. You can see the trailer here.
Okay, so, Mo is a bookbinder and he has a secret: he can read things out of books. This is fucking awesome except he can't necessarily control the things he reads out. For example: 9 years ago Mo was reading his wife a story and he accidentally read out two really bad guys, one sort of good guy and read his wife into the story. Balls. I hate it when that happens. Anyway, this is all news to Meggie, his daughter, until the sort of good guy, Dustfinger, shows up and starts a kerfuffle. Turns out, the big bad, Capricorn, has an even bigger bad he wants Mo to read out (not to mention treasure and wenches) of his story while Dustfinger desperately wants to be read back in.
Then, the good guys do lots of stupid things, like get themselves caught, get themselves put into nets and get all their books burned. Double balls. Eventually, they come up with some pretty lame plans to save the day. I don't mean to make fun, it's just this: if I were ever caught by the bad guy I would be very docile and agreeable. Seriously, I feel like things work better if you are not so obviously trying to escape. Maybe play along. People in books never do that, especially pre-teen girls. Give me a break, I would be baking Capricorn and his creepy mother cookies and offering to do their laundry so as not to get myself kilt.
Oh! Dustfinger has a marten with horns. That's this kind of marten, and not Marten Broadcloak, in case you were wondering. P.S. I want to snuggle with a marten. Additionally: my new puppy's middle name is Marten. His first name is Viggo (as in the Carpatian)
So, one of the things I liked about this book was the complete reverence the characters had for books. It was funny to read this and the Thirteenth Tale at the same time because they were both bibliophile books.
I am excited about this movie, but I am worried that it will be cheesy and I can tell from the trailer that lots of made up extra stuff goes down. Either way, I have a crush on Paul Bettany and I hope to see lots of him breathing fire. I also have a crush on Helen Mirren, so that should be good too.
Anywho: this is part of a trilogy, and you can read more about it here. I shall be reading the second book at some point, that's a promise. In case you were wondering, if I could read things out of books I would read out Oy from the Dark Tower series. I would want to read out Edward from the Twilight Saga, or Roarke, from the ...In Death series, but the truth is: they wouldn't be into me so that would be a bummer. I like to think that Oy and I could have fun though. Oy! Un!

The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield

2007-12-18T18:15:00.000-08:00

Paperback: 432 pages
Publisher: Washington Square Press; Reprint edition (October 9, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0743298039
ISBN-13: 978-0743298032
List Price: $15.00
I finished this book on Dec. 18

This book was recommended to me by an English teacher at my school, who said to me: "If you like Rebecca, you will like this." P.S. I effing love Rebecca. Lurve. Anyway, so I got the book, and I must say: I was not disappointed.
Okay: Margaret Lea loves books about as much as I do. She works in a family owned Antiquarian Bookshop and reads lots of history, and occasionally writes a biography of various crusty old dead men for fun. Vida Winter is a prolific author. She has written about a bajillion books and has an air of mystery, mostly due to the fact that she has never ever told the truth about her personal life. One day Miss Lea gets a letter from the mysterious Ms. Winter, requesting her services as a biographer. Best part? Lea has never read any of her books. Hee.
Margaret reluctantly signs on to a trial run with the author, but Ms. Winter insists on telling the story her way - as a story, in order without answering questions. So she proceeds to spin a yarn of such craziness, such gothic goodness, that Miss Lea cannot resist seeing the story through. Let me tell you my lovelies, this is some good shit. Insanity ensues. Ms. Winter tells the story of Angelfield, the place she grew up, otherwise known as nutbar central, or, the house that fucking crazies built.
There's a lot about twins and family and secrets. Very cool stuff. The parts where Mrs. Winter is telling the story are the best parts, and the parts where Margaret is researching are not as good at first, but totally get better. This is good rainy day reading, or good snowy weekend reading (as we have just had here). Okay, it's pretty much good reading regardless of the meteorological conditions.
I have not heard of Diane Setterfield, the author, before, but I can tell you she has fantastic hair. Beyond that, you'll have to look here. Also: the book has a rather dramatic, clunky website with little meat and lots of graphics, but A for effort, you know?

Film Review: I Am Legend

2007-12-16T17:59:00.000-08:00

Based on the book: I Am Legend
Directed by: Francis Lawrence
Screenplay by: Mark Protosevich and Akiva Goldsman
Warner Bros. Pictures (2007)
PG-13
101 min.
I watched this film on Dec. 14

Okay, so I'm not trying to be one of those asshats who's all: "Oh, the movie was sooo much better than the book!" because: fuck that noise, the are different things. But I will be the first to tell you if a movie is different. You may remember that I read this book and reviewed it: here. Also, here's more info on the book, but beware of spoilers in that link.
Anyway, Will "Parents Just Don't Understand" Smith is Robert Neville here and his name, the general scenario and the title are about the only similarities to the book. But let's put those facts aside for a moment and discuss the film.
Smith, as usual, is beautiful, strong and really an actor who deserves more credit. I would image it's pretty damn hard to carry an entire movie with only yourself, a dog to deal with (also some hungry girl at the end - eat a cookie!). He is entrancing as someone who is in this impossible situation, who is both fixed on survival and a bit mad. I actually teared up (just call me Weepy McEstrogen) at one part just because of his face. I literally couldn't watch he was emoting so believably.
So, you can imagine that the story of the last(ish) man on Earth is a fucking bummer, and that's true. But, it's also creepy. The vamp/sickies were creepy, though a little too CG at times. Either way, I do not want to get eaten by one of those guys.
Okay, now, the things they changed, ie: everything. They totally changed Skinny McHungrypants as a character which was lame and that in turn changed the whole effing ending and the reason for the title. Which is kind of lame. I'm not going to get into it, you should read it, but trust me, it's bizarre. Though, this ending gave a more sunshiny, lollipops kind of ending, unlike the book.
Once again, I really did like this movie. It was intense, it was creepy, there were some good jumps and there was lots of emotion (possibly even a chuckle). So, see it. But...you know, read the book too.

Film Review: The Golden Compass

2007-12-09T07:05:00.000-08:00

Based on the book: The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman
Directed by Chris Weitz
Screenplay by Chris Weitz
New Line Cinema (2007)
rated PG-13
113 min.
I watched this film on Dec. 7

So, okay. Wow. Remember this? I have only gotten more excited to see this movie since then. And let me tell you, this movie did not disappoint.
So, right from the beginning to the very end the story adaptation is good, it doesn't make crazy shit up or leave out important things. It cuts our story off a bit before the end of the book, but I feel confident that they will include that all in the beginning of the next. And, if for some reason there is not a next, I will have to punch a bitch.
Either way, I wasn't sure how I was going to feel either about the little girl playing Lyra, or Nicole Kidman, and they both impressed me. Dakota Blue Richards is the girl, and this appears to be her first movie. She's very good and believable as Lyra, who, is really a great character. She's rude, she's a trouble-maker, and she's brave, and this girl did a fantastic accent - almost exactly what I imagined. Kidman played Mrs. Coulter like a goddamn crazy person and it was pretty cool. Who hits their own daemon?! Religious crazies who are cuckoo for cocoa puffs, that's who. She also looks beautiful (as always) and very, very thin and tall. Her costumes accentuate that. And, her golden monkey is effin creepy. You almost feel bad for it because it's clear that Coulter's craziness even freaks him out (and he's CG).
People's daemons are super cool. Lyra's Pan switches his form effortlessly and sometimes midair, which is super cool. Also, apparently, he's voiced by Freddie Highmore. And they look real and cuddly.
OMG - bear fight! First off, I didn't realize Gandalf was the voice of Iorek. The bears were super sweet and the fight was amazing. Seriously, it was crazy talk. They kept going for the money shot of the bear growling (howling? yelling? wtf noise do bears make?) and you'd think it got old, but man, it never did. Chills.
I feel like they are playing up the religious aspects a bit more than the first book really did, which is fine with me. I also think the ensuing kerfuffle about it is, of course, insane. It's like the stink they made over DaVinci Code, but the difference is, this movie is actually good.

New Feature: Movie Trailers!

2007-12-08T06:13:00.000-08:00

Hey my lovlies. So, because I review movies that are based on books, and because there are some I am excited about, and because I feel like it (and love run on sentences) I am adding a new sexy feature to the blog. Movie Trailers! I this will probly be rather haphazard and posted only when there is something I am really excited about. Either way: hope you enjoy!
First up is the new Chronicles of Narnia movie Prince Caspian. I will totally need to read this again before the release of the movie as my memory of it is very foggy. Sadly, none of the kids have gotten any cuter, but Prince Caspian is pretty good looking, despite having some awesomely bad layers. You only see it for a minute so I couldn't tell if it was more 80s or flat-ironed man shag. Either way: here you go:

Next up is Inkheart, which is a popular YA novel by Cornelia Funke. I am currently listening to this on tape, so I almost didn't want to watch the trailer, but it's very cool that it will be a movie. Also, Vanessa Redgrave is reading my version, so in my head, I thought the father was older than Brendan Frasier. (I should not want to make out with Moe, is my feeling.) Either way, be patient and you will have my book review for that soonish (I think the tape is something over 10 hours). Enjoy:

Update: I've finally finished the book and I've watched the trailer. I have some concerns, but hopefully it will be awesome. Also: huge crush on Paul Bettany. Especially if he plays with fire. *sigh*

Mister I by Lewis Trondheim

2007-12-04T19:16:00.000-08:00

Hardcover: 32 pages
Publisher: Nantier Beall Minoustchine Publishing; English Ed edition (January 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1561634867
ISBN-13: 978-1561634866
List Price: $13. 95
I finished this book on Dec. 4

See that guy? He's Mister I. And...he's kind of a dick. Really. He's all about trying to steal food. Pies from windows, apples of trees, that kind of thing.
I'm not going to talk about this book much because it's something you really need to see to believe, but here's what I can tell you: Each page is a block of 60 postage stamp size pictures of Mister I's antics. He is usually trying to steal food and mostly ends up dead at the end (a la Kenny from South Park) Some of them are super funny. Some are sad and most are just really fucked up. Here's an example of a page:
So, yeah. If this were a cartoon it would be Don Hertzfeldt's Rejected. What? Please show another movie, bee? No problem my lovelies. I live to serve. P.S. if you think this cartoon is funny, you should probably find this book and read the hell out of it (also, no words! hello, visual literacy!)

The Realm of Possibility by David Levithan

2007-12-04T18:44:00.001-08:00

Paperback: 224 pages
Publisher: Knopf Books for Young Readers (May 9, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0375836578
ISBN-13: 978-0375836572
List Price: $8.95
I finished this book on Dec. 3

So, Mr. Levithan is the scribe of other booknerd reviewed books. One I really like, and another that got the coveted bee seal of approval.
Anywho: in addition to having a great title, and am amazing cover, this book is in free verse. Fucking rad. It is poems from a huge variety of high school students. It is a dozen stories from all different points of views. It is song lyrics, anguished cries for help, and love letters.
The books starts and ends with a poem about a young gay couple: Daniel and Jed. These couples are mentioned throughout the book in other people's poems, and the book finishes with them as well in a poem that makes me all mushy inside. Some of the other poems include a girl who retaliates by wailing a bully in the schnoz with a lunch tray and another from the bully in question. There is a girl with an eating disorder, a lesbian musician with unrequited love. My favorite is the girl who writes all the amazing phrases on desks, lockers and walls and then the reaction from others. Some of the choice phrases: YOU ARE HAPPY EVEN IF YOU ARE AFRAID TO ADMIT IT, YOU ARE FOOLISH IN YOUR UNHAPPINESS, and the ever popular: YOU ARE IMPLICATED
I confess that I'm not entirely sure how one is supposed to read some of these poems, and I often found myself sort of singing them to myself in my head (yeah, I know that makes me sound like a wacko. whatever, I stand by it.) There are four sections and they give different points of view. If you really pay attention, or maybe take notes, you can figure out who everyone is and how they are related. That is very cool, but even separate, each character is interesting.
Did I mention that I saw Mr. Levithan speak once and I thought he was dreamy? (Maybe I do think all intelligent gay men are dreamy, but that doesn't make him any less so.) Either way, this didn't disappoint and I can't wait to read more of his stuff.
I wouldn't suggest this for just anyone, but I am sad for those who wouldn't appreciate it. It is honest, sad, sweet, hopeful and beautiful.

Good Vocabularies are sexy, so is giving

2007-11-28T03:43:00.000-08:00

People, (when you are done reading my blog) stop dicking around on the internet (i know you're looking at questionable materials and LOLcats. oh, wait, that's me...) and go to: FreeRice.com It's a site where you go and guess the answers to vocabulary words and for each one you get right, 20 grains of rice are donated to an impoverished country.
The site rates your vocabulary prowess and sets them at your level. My highest is level 41 so far (out of a possible 50) I challenge myself and you to get higher and donate more rice!
I love the idea of this site, both helping people expand their vocabulary and helping hungry people. Seriously, a well spoken person is very sexy, so: Go now! What are you waiting for??

Blue Bloods by Melissa De La Cruz

2007-11-26T18:15:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Paperback: 336 pages
Publisher: Hyperion (March 27, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 142310126X
ISBN-13: 978-1423101260
List Price: $8.99
I finished this book on Nov. 26

So, first off: this is the first book finished/review from my new house! I'll be posting pictures soon, once we're more situated.
Right, the book: have you ever heard of vampires with different colored blood? Now you have: thanks to this YA vamp tale. Fucking get this: they are rich kid vampires...and they really have blue blood. Ack.
Our heroine Schuyler (who shall henceforth be called Skylar cause that's cooler and I can't spell that other Dutch nonsense) who is apparently a "young Kate Moss" (p.s. i can't stand kate moss. too skinny, not cute, coke addict, grossest boyfriend ever. hate! so much hate i refuse to capitalize. or write complete sentences!) Anywho: Skylar is from a super rich family and goes to some crazy prep school in NYC. Apparently she is goth, and dresses like a homeless person, but also sometimes models. The fuck? Whatever. So, she finds out she's really a vampire. There's some really bizarre vampire history here about how they are totally immortal and die so they can chill out, but then their memories are reborn or something. I dunno, I didn't really get it/like it.
Anyway, nothing is supposed to be able to kill the blue bloods, but (dun dun dun!) something is. Oh noes! So, Sky has to figure it out with the on again off again help of Jack Force, fellow vamp and sometime douche bag. Also, there was something about Jack having to marry his twin sister. V. C. Andrews, anyone?
What I didn't like about this (besides the above) is that these rich kids have an irritating sense of entitlement. Why are three 15 and 16 year olds sitting at a hotel bar drinking cocktails, not to mention getting into clubs. Also, I can't stand name dropping of any kind and there's a fuck-load of that in there too. The only fashion I know is Project Runway (what happened to Andre?)
and I'd like to keep it that way. Do not talk about designers/brands to me in order to impress me, thanks.
So, yeah. Oh, I forgot to mention that absolutely nothing goddamn happens in the end. Not a thing is resolved. At all. Cause there's a sequel. Something about Italy. Or space pirates, I wasn't really listening. Cool cover, but I still wouldn't recommend it.

Twisted by Laurie Halse Anderson

2007-11-17T20:31:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Hardcover: 272 pages
Publisher: Viking Juvenile (March 20, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0670061018
ISBN-13: 978-0670061013
List Price: $16.99
I finished this book on Nov. 17

First, let's say that I actually began listening to this book on Random House audio book read by Mike Chamberlain. However, this was proving to be a super pain in the ass, because my car is a time machine from 1995 and it has a tape player (remember those?) and my iTunes was being a bitch downloading the disks to my iPod. Wow, that was a horribly boring story. Sorry. Anyway, so I finally snagged the book at my library. We have two copies which have literally not sat on our shelves more than a day since the beginning of the school year. On Friday when I saw one in the return bin I did a little happy dance and claimed it as my own.
Okay, first thoughts: this book is about Tyler Miller who is a senior in high school and a bit of a loser by his own admission. It is a bit weird to have a grown man with excellent diction read this story in with a teenager's voice. Especially when he says things like "trouser snake" (yikes). Oh, would you like to hear it? No problem: booknerd provides. Please enjoy a clip of a chapter early on in the book courtesy of Random House Audio Publishing:
It's kinda weird, right? My favorite favorite is when the dude makes the "chicken" noise. Ba-gock! (which makes me think of Bangkok which makes me think of this.)
Anyway, so this cheerful sort of underdog story takes a pretty serious turn when some major shenanigans occur at a party. (for the record, I never knew of any party like this when I was in high school. where are these parties happening?) Tyler, having gotten busted for his Foul Deed (of defacing the school), is the first suspect after the shit goes down. Anywho: he goes through a lot and you really feel for the poor kid. Also, his dad is a turbo douche. (this is the second book in a row with a dad who's a total ass) but Tyler is lucky to have a cool mom, a cooler sister and a best friend who is named after a Star Wars character.
Of course I loved the other books that I've read by Mrs. Anderson, and I saw her speak once and she was phenomenal. She held someone in the crowd's baby, it was cute. She was very funny and cool. Either way, this one did not disappoint in any way and it's amazing to me that she's so versatile a writer. She writes these amazing books from the point of views of these very different characters, and of course a really cool historical fiction book too. I can't wait to read more of her books, if they ever make it back to the library...

Luna by Julie Anne Peters

2007-11-17T14:01:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: Little, Brown Young Readers (February 1, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0316011274
ISBN-13: 978-0316011273
List Price: $7.99
I finished this book on Nov. 17

Okay, this is why I love writing this blog. I did not realize that the green guy on the cover had as much significance as it does until i did my research for you, my lovelies. Oh, what? Maybe I should tell you what the book is about first. It's about a teen boy who is transgendered. And he only gets to dress up at night so he calls himself Luna. So, moth on the cover for the whole coming out of a cocoon thing and it's a Luna moth. Awesome.
So, here's the thing, Liam (or Luna) obviously has a really hard life not being able to be who he knows he really is. Not to mention that his dad is all about the male chauvinism. But, what this story is really about is Reagan, Luna's younger sister. Reagan is the only one who is in on the secret for their whole lives. She feels like Liam/Luna is her sole responsibility. Because of this she does not feel like she has any part of her that is for herself. She is so out of the loop that when a boy, Chris, begins to flirt with her and asks her out she totally has no idea how to react. Things progress with Chris, though, but Reagan's new life as a member of society with a possible boyfriend are put on hold by her concerns for Luna. As Luna becomes more unhappy with her life as a boy and more determined to transition to a female form, tension mounts. Then, some crazy shit goes down.
The whole time I could not honestly predict what was going to happen, and when the end came I was sort of tearfully happy about it. Also, their dad is a super-douche. I mean it. His super powers include: telling horrible jokes, and being a goddamn homophobic asshat. Also, their mom was not too cool either. She was a bitch, actually, and I feel she probly should have dumped that dad. Argh.
Either way, I thought that the characters of Reagan, her brother and their best friend Aly were all very realistically created. I also sort of like Chris, except there was one scene in which he acted totally out of character for just about any high school boy. Oh well, can't win 'em all. Anyway, this was a powerful and moving story about a girl who is under a tremendous amount of pressure from her family and her brother's horrible struggle. This should be in any library and could probly be read by middle school kids (though they might not understand the whole bloke in a dress thing).
P.S. I am Spartacus! This is Booknerd's 100th Entry. Woot! Thank you for those of you who check in regularly. And, if you got here accidentally by looking for gay porn, stay and hang out a while. I'm nice!
Also, leave me messages on Meebo and talk to me when I'm actually there. I promise I'll be funny and nice :)

The Road of the Dead by Kevin Brooks

2007-11-11T15:47:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Hardcover: 352 pages
Publisher: The Chicken House (March 1, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0439786231
ISBN-13: 978-0439786232
List Price: $16.99
I finished this book on Nov. 11

We have several of this guys books in the library and they all looked rather intriguing to me. I chose this one because of two things: gypsies and a kid I thought was vaguely psychic. Eh. I suppose I was hoping for cool gypsy curses and possibly girls wearing lots of jewelry. Not so much.
Ruben, our narrator, has the ability to sometimes "be with people" (not like that, you perv) which seems to me like a sort of astral projection/being able to sense what they are sensing kind of thing. This never gets explained or used in a way that I would use it (aka: spying on people while they are in the shower. just kidding ((no i'm not)) or I dunno...using it to find things out about bad guys) Anywho: Ruben's sister gets kilt (boo) and so he and his (possibly sociopath or at the least chemically imbalanced.) brother go to find out who did it. Now, please understand that they to not really care who did it, they just want the investigation to end so they can bring her body home and bury it (whaa?).
Anyway, of course they uncover a super plot with lots of bad guys and some ultraviolence. So...we hear this whole story about their trying to find the culprits, and lots of stuff happens and then it's the end. And...you don't really get to find out how the brother accomplished all these important things. "Does it really matter?" Ruben asks himself. Yes, asshat, I just spent 337 pages trying to find out. It matters to me. I want to know. Did Cole kill that fucker? Where was the body? Argh!
So, I'm not saying it's a bad book or anything, cause it's not. But that was some seriously weak sauce there at the end. I want to know. I'm invested. So, lots of violence, reasonable storyline, only a little predictable and a sort of lame ending. I dunno. Once again, I find myself with my thumb planted firmly horizontal. Le sigh.

The Dark Horse Book of Witchcraft edited by Scott Allie

2007-11-11T06:56:00.000-08:00

Hardcover: 96 pages
Publisher: Dark Horse (June 30, 2004)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1593071086
ISBN-13: 978-1593071080
List Price: $14.95
I finished this book on Nov 11

So, this little collection was on the "Shelf of Shame" at my school. Meaning that, some other esteemed librarian in the past had found it to be inappropriate for our students. I took it home to investigate.
So, what we have here is a collection of what appears to be a smattering of different animated stories about witches and witchcraft. For example, there is a tale about a toad-like witchie poo who by force of potions gets a young man to have creepy toad sex with her. Note to attractive young men (or anyone really) it is very unwise to drink any concoction cooked up by a crone who you expect to be a witch. Honestly. It's as bad as Ofelia eating the grapes. There was also a comic book treatment given to the witches from Shakespeare's Macbeth as well as a little Hellboy action. Of course, don't forget a story about Tituba and the Salem Witch Trials. That one actually had the illustrations I liked the best.
Now, crammed in the middle of all this is an interview with a Wiccan laywer Phyllis Curott who talks about the actual religious practice of witchcraft. Including something like this is a good idea, however, the questions and answers that make up this particular interview did not particularly do it for me. I feel this book would be aimed at school age kids, and this interview would go right over their heads. If you're really interested in reading about Wicca I recommend trying Wicca: A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner by Scott Cunningham, or if have goth-leanings then maybe Nocturnal Witchcraft: Magic After Dark by Konstantinos is for you (Konstantinos also has a good Vampire book out there, in case you're interested.)
Anyway, the moral of this whole story is: I didn't find anything in this book that I would think is totally out of hand for my high school students to read. There's a little sex talk in the toad-lady story, but nothing overly graphic (and, thankfully, no in your face picture of toad-boobs). However, there is something of a mixed message in here. The forward and the interview with the real witch trying to dispel the stereotype of old gross crone doesn't really jibe with the wart covered old ladies of questionable hygiene portrayed within. Then again, getting rid of witch stereotypes is about as simply done as getting rid of librarian stereotypes, so what can you expect. (Very few people can refrain from making a crack about my specks when I tell them I'm a librarian.)

Dracula: the Graphic Novel by Bram Stoker, Gary Reed and Becky Cloonan

2007-11-08T17:28:00.000-08:00

Paperback: 176 pages
Publisher: Puffin (March 2, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0142405728
ISBN-13: 978-0142405727
List Price: $10.99

Let's start with the cover shall we? Wow. First, Dracula looks like a male stripper/Elvis impersonator version of a vampire, no? Not nearly as sexy as Stuart Townsend or Keifer Sutherland (or really anyone from the Lost Boys) and not nearly as creepy as Bela Lugosi. Also, Mina looks like Christina Ricci. A lot. Not that there's anything wrong with that but she should totally sue.
Okay, that's off my chest. Now, the actual illustrations. There's nothing wrong with them, per say. It's just that...well...everyone looks like they are in a goddamn emo band. Seriously. It's bizarre. Please check out Jonathan Harker getting bitten by Dracula here: He's all "Oh noes! Please don't mess up my eye makeup!" All I'm saying is: he looks like Pete Wentz. Which is bad news. (Damn you, Becky Cloonan, for making me admit I know who that douche is.) And you think Dracula looks bad there? When he gets young he grows flowing locks of fury. Spooky! The female characters actually look pretty good. They have good hair that artfully blows into their faces as all comic book females should (I wish my hair did that). Dr. Seward looks like a malnourished Snape with a ponytail. And he's inexplicable sweaty. Oooh! And Van Helsing sort of looks like a wolf man.
Thirdly: the adaptation. I'm not saying it's bad. But I'm not saying it's good. I'm just saying this: if I hadn't just read Dracula I would probably be very confused.
I have to hope that this kind of book would appeal to the tween population and maybe I'm just too old and lame to get it. But, I kinda doubt it.
Now, for fun: please enjoy a booknerd recommended video. My excuse for posting this is that this song is definitely vampiric. And it's effin rad. Thanks, Chip!

Anyone But You by Lara Zeises

2007-11-05T17:39:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Mass Market Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: Laurel Leaf; Reprint edition (November 13, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0440238587
ISBN-13: 978-0440238584
List Price: $6.50
I finished this book Nov. 4

I know my lovelies. You were thinking: "Gee, bee, I wish you'd review some more obscure YA literature, because I can't get enough." And I'm all "No prob, I live to serve." Aren't I sweet like that?
Anyway, first off, here's a list of some character names from this one: Critter, Layla, Jesse and Seattle. My take: someone who's name is Critter is not allowed to be sexy. Ever. Layla is a good name, but is now permanently associates with Eric Clapton's hard on for George Harrison's wife and Seattle, well, they call her Sea for short and that annoys me. Also, Jesse reminds me of Uncle Jesse, and even though I'd make out with John Stamos in real life, ugh.
The story: Seattle's dad sucks at life and briefly dated Layla and then abandoned them, leaving Seattle with Layla with her own biological children, Critter and Jesse. So, even though Sea is not her daughter nurse Layla raises her as though she is. Now Sea is 15 and Critter is 17 and they maybe have the hots for each other. Yeah, this is the Brady Bunch sequel movie in book form. Okay, so, not that dramatic, but they definitely dig each other. And they each have some bizarre other relationship they are working on through the course of the book and neither of them work out. Both of their potential significant others seem odd to me, as in they are not very believable characters. The book makes up for this, though, by having realistic teenage fights and a good single mom character.
So, let me ask you this? They aren't technically siblings, but it's weird...right? Right? Hello? Don't worry, nobody ends up getting any (or not much, at least).
Anywho: props to Ms. Zeises for having a cool looking sight and referring to herself as a dorkus extremus (I often refer to myself as a nerd-bomb, in case you were wondering).
Oh! And Critter loved Rod Stewart! What?? You know who else loves Rod Stewart? My mom! Boo! Because I cannot in good conscience link to the real deal please enjoy Mike Meyer's take on him. Piper down!

Inexcusable by Chris Lynch

2007-11-04T05:51:00.000-08:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Paperback: 165 pages
Publisher: Simon Pulse (May 8, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1416939725
ISBN-13: 978-1416939726
List Price: $6.99
I finished this book on Nov. 2

So, first off, I have to say that I think this cover is good and everything, but to me, I do not think it speaks to what the book is really about. To me, a stray bra makes me think fun sexy times are to be had. And trust me, that's not what's going on here. What is going on here? Date rape. Boo that.
In describing this book to an English Teacher at my school I said it is like the opposite story of the book Speak. From the mind of the rapist instead of the raped. Yikes, huh. And, for the record, author of Speak, my girlfriend Laurie Halse Anderson has a quote on the back of the book: "...The world needs this story. And you want to read it, trust me." So, yeah: here's the setup. Keir is a high school senior and he tells this story, which alternates between his graduation from high school and the night he is accused of date rape. In reading this I knew there was something wrong with Keir, and eventually you start to realize that the way he describes things is not really the way a rational person might see them. But his narrative makes me think there is something wrong with him. Some sort of social thing, he doesn't seem to have much of a conscience, and mostly bases this opinions of right and wrong on how other people react to him. Keir keeps saying that he's a good guy, but his evidence for this is never a good deed he's done, it's always based on another person's opinion. Super Weird.
So, he claims he's in love with poor Gigi Boudakian (who's the kind of person you always refer to by their whole name, apparently) and she is the girl who accuses him. There is a sort of mounting suspense during Keir's tale of graduation, going to parties, doing drugs...because the whole time you know what's going to happen. It's very bad news.
It was interesting to see this side of the story and of course, somewhat disturbing. Don't be fooled by that cover, though. There is no fun sex romp to be had within.

Godless by Pete Hautman

2007-11-01T17:58:00.000-07:00

Turtleback: 198 pages
Publisher: Turtleback Books (March 30, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0606348506
ISBN-13: 978-0606348508
List Price: $16.95
I finished this book on Oct. 30

So, this one is by the same guy who wrote Sweetblood, and he has another one I'd really like to read (but is checked out) Invisible.
Jason Bock (as in, the chicken noise) is 15 and agnostic going on atheist. (Do you think they could sing about that a la the Sound of Music? Cause that's funny to me). Mr. Bock (ba-gock!) makes up a religion worshiping the water tower, cause...why not. Anyway, Jason's crazy snail catching friend gets into the religion and of course some other schmucks to do, including a pretty girl (of course). So, as with most religions (imho) when many people get involved and try to mess with faith shenanigans ensue.
This books gets points for many things: an interesting look at religion, awesome bits of the made up "Chutengodian" gospel at the beginning of each chapter, also a funny premise and the repeat use of the word "pods" short for gastropods (snails, duh).
I like the point that this book is trying to make about religion. It's interesting to me and it's nice to see a YA book dealing with this topic in such an approachable way.
Mr. Hautman's page is pretty cool, and he's available for speaking engagements. Also, please enjoy a teacher's guide to this book, also compliments of his website.

Sweetblood by Pete Hautman

2007-10-29T18:19:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Mass Market Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: Simon Pulse (August 10, 2004)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0689873247
ISBN-13: 978-0689873249
List Price: $5.99
I finished this book on Oct. 29

Here is what happens when I have to go through a list of all the titles in my library. I start adding titles to my list of books to read like a crazy person. Also, I have added this to my challenge reading list and switched it up a bit because I just bought a house and I'm busy (this is my excuse for everything right now, and it tastes good)
As you may know, my dearies, I do love vampire stories. I also love YA lit. This little gem combines both those into a neat little package. So, Lucy (hehe, I just got that reference to Stoker when I typed it) is a 16 year old diabetic goth (but she'll tell you she's a not-goth. oooh, goth-served) and she has a fantastic theory about vampires. Little Miss Lucy says that original vamps were actually people suffering from advanced diabetes. She writes an extremely cool paper on this topic for her English class which definitely freaks out her teacher and parents. And you know what that means...time for a shrink! Also, Lucy spends lots of time in vampire chat rooms and finds herself mixing with some very questionable people at parties.
This is a very interesting take on illness, goth kids and teen angst. As I write this I find I'm liking it more and more. I suggest reading it just to check out the paper that Lucy wrote her teacher elaborating on her diabetics as vamps theory. It's a cool idea and vamp enthusiast should check out.

Dreamcatcher by Stephen King

2007-10-29T17:39:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 684 pages
Publisher: Albin Michel (April 9, 2003)
ISBN-10: 2226131906
ISBN-13: 978-2226131904
List Price: $7.99
I finished this book on Oct. 27

So, as you know, I lurve me some Stephen King. And oddly, I have never read this book before. However, I did watch the film version from 2003 when it came out in theaters. Now, the movie actually follows the book pretty closely but for two things: though Morgan Freeman is effin awesome, he's not Kurtz in my head. You know who is? Maybe a crazy Kevin Spacey, I dunno. The other thing is: was there some obsession with the song Blue Bayou in the movie? I seem to remember that, but it's totally not in the book. (and great, now I have it in my head mmm Linda Ronstadt is dreamy...)
Okay, back on task: shit weasels. That's right. This one is about creepy crawly skeeviati monsters. And evil foliage. Oh, I'm sorry, did you want a real synopsis? Here goes: a group of four friends go camping in the Maine woods and aliens slowly start to take over the world via red fuzz and creepy parasites that cause their hosts to cook up some super-funktastic farts. Also, the superfriends have a mysterious fifth pal, Duddits, whose powers have rubbed off a bit on the others. My friends did give me a Harry Potter Sorting Hat, but that's not quite as cool as goddamn telepathy. Just sayin...
So, this book was super gross and cool. One of the characters gets sort of taken over by an alien and lives for a while in an office in his own head. I loved those scenes, I got chills once or twice somewhere in there. Another example of the magic of my b/f SK. I read this book for the challenge and it gets extra points for allowing me to type the phrase 'shit-weasels' (there! I said it again. hee)

Goodbye, Chunky Rice by Craig Thompson

2007-10-26T16:16:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 128 pages
Publisher: Pantheon (May 9, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0375714766
ISBN-13: 978-0375714764
List Price: $12.95
I finished this book on Oct. 24

So, in the grand tradition of me crying at hallmark greeting cards and pretty much everything else, this frigging graphic novel made me cry.
Ready? Here goes:Little Mouse and Little Turtle are friends. (Little Turtle's name is Chunky Rice, I have no idea why. Is he Chinese food? I dunno, but let's go along with it.) Anyway, Turtle guy is going away, presumably forever. (Don't make me quote Sandlot again here, people) and this is a cause for much grief. There is a weird dude who is trying to cover up for past mistakes by befriending a self mutilating bird (?!) and a creepy set of conjoined twins. And the trip to the new place the Turtle guy is gonna live doesn't go very well. And the Little Turtle and the Little Mouse are both so sad. And here's me on my couch all "Boo Hoo, the little Mouse is so cute and sad! And they miss each other so much! Why can't we all just get along?" Damn you Mr. Thompson, I was snuffly for the rest of the night.
Anyway, it's a sweet and sad look at friendship and loss. But really, it's cute animals. Please check out Mr. Turtle Rice Butt. He's Teh Qte. (Yes, I spend far too much of my life with Cuteoverload and lolcats. Lolcats never make me cry.)
So, in my next book choice I will try to chose something that is less sniffles and more giggles.

Avigon: Gods and Demons by Che Gilson and Jimmie Robinson

2007-10-16T16:13:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 192 pages
Publisher: Image Comics (June 29, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1582405034
ISBN-13: 978-1582405032
List Price: $19.95
I finished this book on Oct. 15

I nabbed this one from my library's fledgling graphic novel collection cause I thought it looked neat. I was right. And p.s. search engines: no I did not mean "Avignon"
Back on task: Avigon is a clockwork robot sort of gal, only she has feelings. And she can break your neck like it's no big. You know, usual girl stuff. So anyway, she's annoyed that she's made to live with and obey the woman who created her so she's all: "I'm out, suckas!" and runs away. You and I both know that she's gonna find out that the outside world isn't as glamorous as she thinks it is. Apparently she hasn't ever read a book or seen an after school special like this. So, our girl takes a powder and gets the real world treatment and wears some fishnet clothes (awesome! did I mention she is a super badass and like 7 feet tall?). Eventually, important lessons are learned and one smarmy dude with some seriously warped views of love gets pwned.
Oh, and there's also a totally amazing fight between some broad with wings and a clockwork who looks like Robert Smith of The Cure (who did kick Barbara Streisand's ass in a fight). There was more than one moment where I gasped out loud during this book. (I historically have an inappropriate reaction to surprise/fear. Like laughing or saying really dumb things.) And there was certainly a surprise or two here.
The illustrations are very cool, lots of neat angles and images. Though it's black and white I'm throwing in a bonus color pic of some of the characters, cause I'm generous like that. Apparently this author, Che Gilson, is a mystery, cause I couldn't find much on here anywhere, but: please enjoy this interview she did about this book. Also, check out Jimmie Robinson's myspace. And...here's some more about the book.
Note: when I grow up I want to be a kick ass robot goth chick. That is all.

Dead on Town Line by Leslie Connor, illustrated by Leslie Connor

2007-10-14T17:33:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Paperback: 144 pages
Publisher: Puffin (November 2, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 014240697X
ISBN-13: 978-0142406977
List Price: $6.99
I finished this book on Oct. 14

This is the peril of a librarian: there you are, walking along, straightening shelves, and books literally jump out at you. Some of them whisper: "Hey, bee, read me, I'm totally cool." some sort of shout "Hey! Read my ass!" some just sort of stand aside, aloof, knowing you will be drawn to them. This was one of those. Despite the fact that I had serious work to do, and despite the fact that I have books to read for the R.I.P challenge (which I am diligently working on, I swear) I had to read this one. And, since it was just a brief sort of taste of a book, I didn't feel too bad.
So, anywho, here it is: Cassie is dead, and they can't find her body. She is watching them search, but they aren't getting close enough because she's right on the line between two towns and they aren't looking there. This story is told in free verse. Honestly, I have never had the least interest in free verse (I always politely look the other way and try to look busy when Out of the Dust starts tapping me on the shoulder) but for some reason, this just seems so appropriate. And haunting. And sad. And sort of beautiful. And even though you couldn't pay me to read this out loud I really liked the format.
Most of the pages have black and white illustrations on them. Leaves or music notes sort of twirl around the poems. Some illustrations, such as a beautiful one of a field of birds, take up whole pages. The drawings are done by Gina Triplett, an artist who apparently designed her own set of Chucks. Her other illustrations are very cool, I particularly dig this one.
The story is sparse, and I'm not sure which, if any of my students would like this book, but it definitely wormed it's way into me and I thought about finishing it all weekend while I was out of town. Ms. Connor has apparently written some other stuff, so I might try to dig some of that up in the future. Either way, this is a very fall/spooky story. All the reviews/info I peeked at are all: "Blah, blah, blah, Lovely Bones, blah blah." I say boo to that. Does every story about a dead girl have to get compared to that? No. Some books should stand alone. Quiet. Aloof.

A Clockwork Orange: film review

2007-10-08T11:51:00.000-07:00

Based on the book: A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
Directed by Stanley Kubrick
Written by Anthony Burgess (book) and Stanley Kubrick (screenplay)
Warner Bros. (1971)
rated R
136 min
I watched this film on Oct 8

Alright, kiddos, I read this one way back when, near the beginning of this blog. (Actually, my review of it kind of sucks, I'm much funnier now, I feel) So, anyway, I'd never seen the flick. I think for some reason in high school my male pals didn't want me to watch it cause they though it was gonna be too violent for me or something. Hee. Pussies.
So, our young ne'er-do-well, Alex, is a total violent nutbar. He gets into trouble, gets cured and gets un-cured again. I've got to say, I dig their outfits and the milk bar is super cool looking. I totally want to drink my diet pepsi with lemon at a bar with creepy white naked mannequins, effin rad. It was nice to hear that crazy made up language being spoken and I felt all kinds of smart because I had sort of memorized it when I read the book. I totally want to start calling people my droogs and referring to my head as my gulliver. Think that will fly?
Also: let's talk about Malcolm McDowell for a second, k? Linderman was looking kinda good in this, a bit like Ewan McGregor, I feel. All I'm saying is, I might have wanted to make out with him a little. Either way, he had fantastic hair. Also, why I do I remember him from Milk Money so much? Really, why do I remember that movie at all? Ack.
Back on task: so this film followed the book pretty well, but why leave out the last chapter? Boo that. (if you're interested in reading a super in depth synopsis check this out, but really, if you're that interested just watch it) Either way this one followed the story a lot more faithfully than Kubrick's adaptation of my boyfriend Stephen King's The Shining. All in all, I didn't really find this movie all that violent. Maybe with today's standards of gorno movies I am desensitized. Either way, extra points for lots of gratuitous breastages and a giant ceramic boypart.

Cut by Patricia McCormick

2007-10-04T19:08:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 160 pages
Publisher: Push (February 1, 2002)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0439324599
ISBN-13: 978-0439324595
List Price: $6.99
I finished this book on Oct. 4

So, cause I am a turbo nerd I joined a book club with some other teen librarians. For the upcoming meeting we are reading "problem novels" to discuss. This is one of those. Also, it's a popular book with my female students (well, the ones who actually read.) So, I picked it up and read in in one sitting.
The truth of the matter is: books like this are upsetting. I teared up a bit here, I'm not ashamed to tell you. (so you know, that's nothing special: I cry all the time, especially at Campbell's soup commercials. say what you want, that shit is deep.)
So, Callie is narrating this book and she's in a loony bin and apparently I'm the shrink (do you know what I mean there? It's that weird first person where she keeps saying "You do this" about the shrink, like I'm the shrink? What's that called? I dunno.) Anywho, Callie won't talk. Life is pretty hard when you don't ever talk. Especially when you get a phone call. No one can hear nodding over the phone. Her roommate calls her S.T. for silent treatment and that is funny to me. Callie is a cutter and that is what landed her in the crazy house, and that is less funny.
Over the course of this short novel we learn more about Callie and watch her as she starts to explore her behavior and starts on the road to recovery. The book is basically Speak-light and if you were only going to read one I would suggest Speak. Nothing against this one, it's just that Speak is a bit deeper and personally I liked Melinda a little better. Also, the other girls could have been a little funnier, or more realistic or more...something.
In my copy of the book (which I got from the public library cause the copy from my school was checked out) there is a little scrawled note from a kid who'd previously checked it out. I was all worked up about it, but I like to think that this book scribbler is on the road to recovery like our Callie. But, for the record: info on teen help lines here, here and here.
p.s. i swear the next book won't be a bummer.

Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell by Susanna Clarke

2007-10-03T20:05:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 1040 pages
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing PLC (January 2, 2007)
ISBN-10: 0747590052
ISBN-13: 978-0747590057
List Price: $17.99
I finished this book on Oct. 3

Okay, my lovelies. First off: this book took me forever to read. For-ev-er! (name that movie). That is no indicator of quality, mind you, it's more due to it being very long, very British and me trying to adjust to my new work schedule. I promise I will be reading much more frequently, starting...now. p.s. this is the first book I've read for the R.I.P. Challenge.
Anywho: the story. Imagine an alternate version of 19th century Britain in which there is a long history of magic lost, a shady King and two emerging practitioners of magic. Mr. Norrell is set about reviving English Magic, which he does by stamping out any other magicians in the area and buying all the books of magic so that no one else may read them. He's cranky Wilfred Brimley, he's that guy at the restaurant that eats alone and complains that his soup is too cold, he's that creepy uncle that you don't want to get stuck in conversation with. Then there's Jonathan Strange, who becomes Norrell's pupil. Strange is arrogant, young and a quick study of magic. They have an increasingly strained relationship as Strange becomes more independent and skilled. Norrell asks a fairy for help who then causes a wicked ruckus amongst pretty much all involved. Will Scooby and the Gang figure out how to break the enchantment in time?
Ms. Clarke loves footnotes. She is dating them and I have heard that the relationship is growing quite serious. These footnotes are nothing like the brief snippets in Anansi Boys. These are serious, not to be effed with footnotes. They will school you in a fight. I quite enjoyed said footnotes, except more than once I would get all sidetracked thinking about what I just read in it and forget about the actual story. Either way, it was neat. And weird.
Also, for fun, Lord Byron is a character. And briefly Mary Shelley. And, they talk about how the weather in the year 1816 was very strange and the summer was very cold. Also, Frankenstein is one of the books I will be reading for the challenge. For that reason (and that it is pure awesomeness) I am giving you a booknerd exclusive: a video. I swear it's pertinent. Or not. Enjoy!

The Invisible Man by H.G. Wells

2007-09-22T11:03:00.000-07:00

Audio Cassette
Publisher: Recorded Books, Inc. (1988)
Language: English
ASIN: B000JWW2G4
I finished listening to this audio book no Sept. 21

So, I own a copy of this book, I don't know where I got it, but when I went to read it all the pages where in super bizarre wrong order. So, I got it on tape from the library.
I have seen lots of different takes on this story. Remember Bill Cosby, or (terrifyingly) Kevin Bacon and his invisible nudie shots? Yikes Stripes. (Uh, scratch that: upon further investigation Bill Cosby was a ghost in that movie, not invisible. Either way, it was bad). And once again, after hearing the real story I am surprised at the original.
It's mostly an account of what happens after our hero (whose name, we will learn, is Griffin) is already invisible. He's actually kind of bad at it. I'm not saying that I would be better, but I like to think if I found myself invisible I would be a bit more stealthy. Also, he's quite rude to people, which makes him suspicious. Apparently he doesn't know you catch more invisible cats with sugar (or something). Anyway, so he makes a series of mistakes, gets busted and shenanigans ensue. And before he was invisible? He was an (presumably ornery) albino. So, you know, things kinda went from bad to worse with him.
The reader here was an English woman and it's always funny to me when women do men's voices in books on tape. It always leaves me with an impression that every man in the story is sort of a pansy whiner. But, she did do a great cockney accent so that was cool.
Overall, the story was interested, and it led me to think about what I would do if I couldn't be seen. Cause our crank-meister Griffin thought it was gonna be cool to kill folks cause they couldn't see him. That's just rude. I think I would probably cause much tamer mayhem. Like, you know, switching the soup at Bennigans, or goosing people.

The Metamorphosis by Peter Kuper and Franz Kafka

2007-09-17T18:18:00.000-07:00

Hardcover: 80 pages
Publisher: Crown (August 5, 2003)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1400047951
ISBN-13: 978-1400047956
List Price: $7.99
I finished this book on Sept. 16

So, you know what super sucks? Turning into a giant bug. Really, really sucks. That's what happens to Gregor Samsa in Franz Kafka's 1915 novella. This is a graphic novel adaptation of that story done by artist Peter Kuper. His stuff is weird and very cool. My estimation of this gentleman when up considerably when I realized he feels pretty much the same way about G.W. Bush that I do. Anywho: his website is cool, check out the stock illustrations.
So, the story at hand. I confess that when I read the original for some class or another in undergrad I thought it was only okay. I see why they make kids read it and everything, but really: it's just kind of a bummer. Likewise: the graphic novel is scratchy black and white. It is harsh, it is ugly. Except: Gregor the MacDaddy Beetle himself. He's not that ugly. He often looks like a sort of very concerned cartoon dad's head on top of a bug body. I keep thinking that he probably sounds like the dad from The Oblongs. Actually, he kind of looks like him too. Weird. I know that was a horrible description, so feel free to look at pages out of the book here, and here. There was a bit of coolness with the text going in different directions, or following the pattern of Gergor's shell. Overall, though: it was a bit strange. I'm not sure that reading this would make any kid want to read the actual book.
You can study up on the original version at sparknotes, if you're interested, but I'm all set. My grade for this one: meh.

The R.I.P Challenge

2007-09-11T18:22:00.000-07:00

Hey Kiddies. So, its' time for the R.I.P. Challenge over at Stainless Steel Droppings. This is a challenge to read spooky stories brought to you from the Master of Awesomery, Carl, who also hosted the Once Upon a Time Challenge I did this summer. You may read everyone else's reviews over here at the R.I.P.ing Yarns Review site.

I'm gonna do Peril the First: which is to read 4 books from any subgenre I choose. Soooo, here are my choices
Edit: This is my new list, updated on Oct 29. (I had to make some changes due to my schedule and book availability. Also, cause I am lame.)
1. Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell by Susannah Clarke
2. Dead on Town Line by Leslie Connor
3. Dreamcatcher by Stephen King
4. Sweetblood by Pete Hautman

Anansi Boys by Neil Gaiman

2007-09-11T18:00:00.000-07:00

Mass Market Paperback: 400 pages
Publisher: HarperTorch (September 26, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0060515198
ISBN-13: 978-0060515195
List Price: $7.99
I finished this book on September 11

So, my lovelies, another tasty Gaiman book. Amazon calls this a companion piece to American Gods. I'll buy that, however, it's a totally stand alone story in it's own right.
Mr. Nancy (who was in AG) is actually an incarnation of Anansi, a rather jaunty spider god. This book is about his son Fat Charlie who, in the course of the first few chapters, finds out that his father has died, his father was a god, and he has a brother. How's that for a shocker? Also, extra points to Mr. Gaiman for throwing in karaoke, wax fruit, and a literal barrel of monkeys.
As you may remember, I raved over the chocolate covered cherry sweet Stardust (and also the movie, here). This one, while equally amazing, was really more like a savory four course dinner. There were several interesting characters, an awesome, twisty plot and lots of little jokes. I really thought Charlie's inner thoughts were really funny, especially those about Rosie's mom. Ooooh, also fantastic chapter titles. For example: Chapter Five: In which we examine the many consequences of the morning after. Love!!
As I have mentioned ad nauseam: Gaiman has a fantastic blog/website, which you may look at: here. You may also read more about this book and American Gods at wikipedia, if you're interested in that sort of thing.

Blood and Chocolate : film review

2007-09-03T09:44:00.000-07:00

Based on the book Blood and Chocolate by Annette Curtis Klause
Directed by Katja Von Garnier
Written by Ehren Kruger and Christopher P. Landon
Sony Pictures (2007)
PG-13
98 minutes
I watched this film on September 3

Oh, my. First, let me preface this by saying I loved the book. A lot. Which is why I was so stoked to see the movie. And why, having seen it, I'm so angry now. Garbage!
Okay: there is so much changed from the book that basically the only thing that's the same are the characters' names and the fact that some of them are werewolves. First, they made the characters older. Okay, I can deal with that. Then they inexplicably changed the setting from America to Bucharest. What? Also they managed to take out all the beauty, all the moral all the...well, good stuff.
The book is about a teenaged werewolf who is struggling with sexuality, with her heritage, with her identity. In the end she resolves those issues and finds peace. In the movie a pretty blond girl runs around, fights and betrays her identity for a moderately attractive random dude (but, oh, he writes graphic novels, so he's edgy!). Also, because they can't bother to really explain the title they have Vivian work in a Chocolate shop. Get it? Cause the title has the word chocolate in it! So clever. Also, they scraped Vivan's mural, which I would have really liked to see. And, oh, by the way; in an expert move of abandoning everything the whole book stood for: Vivian ends up with the wrong guy in the movie! HATE!! There were points where I was wondering if the people who adapted this even read the book.
Is there some good? Well, the phasing to wolf is borderline cool. However, they morph into honest to God wolves, not mythic Loup-garoux. There are some good looking people in it, but no one in this whole film has chemistry with anyone else. How could Oliver Martinez, who was so hot in Unfaithful be so bland here? Though I hated that movie, his performance was much better when he was philandering with Diane Lane. And Agnes Bruckner who plays Vivian is...I dunno, pretty, or whatever, but she did nothing for me. The worst part is the director brought us Iron Jawed Angels which was super good. And the same producer made Underworld, which I loved.
So you know, Rotten Tomatoes agrees with me that this movie was balls. If, for some reason you are interested in visiting the hilariously bad site for the film...well I warned you. (Also, what's with her fake nails? They are on the movie poster and splashed all over that site. Vivian is so not the kind of girl to sport big fake acrylics). I do highly recommend the book, and you can read more about that here.
Alright, that's it, I'm done. I'm so annoyed that the more I think about this movie the more I'd like to punch someone in the throat.

Goodreads

2007-09-03T09:38:00.001-07:00

Hey kiddies: I found a cool site online and I thought I should share it with all of my fellow bibliophiles. It's called Goodreads and it's a sort of social networking/book review place. You can rate books, write reviews and see what friends are reading. If you sign up you should friend me. You can find my profile here. Love to Patty and Jason for letting me know about this coolness.

The Tooth Fairy by Graham Joyce

2007-08-29T20:10:00.001-07:00

Paperback: 320 pages
Publisher: Gollancz; New Ed edition (March 14, 2002)
ISBN-10: 1857983424
ISBN-13: 978-1857983425
List Price: $15.99
I finished this book on August 29

Okay, I bought this book for three reasons. Now, mind you, they are not particularly good reasons, but here they are: because I had a gift card, because the cover reminded me of the cover of Speak, which I liked, and because the blurb on the back said the fairy seduces the boy. So, I'm all: Seduced? I'm in!
But let me just tell you: this shit is weird. I'm all: Baroo? Even until tonight, when I only had a little bit left of the book, I never felt like I knew what was going on. Now that it's over, and I've let it marinade a bit, I have decided what happened. Weirdness, that's what. But not entirely unpalatable weirdness.
Okay, here goes: It's 1960's England and Sam, Terry and Clive are friends. Get ready for my favorite line the the book: "But power in this group, true power, rested in the hands of the one who had the stamina to say "Fuck off" more times and more vigorously than the next man." Squee! I love cursing! Anyway: so they are friends and then they meet Alice and they all love her and oh by the way, Sam sees the Tooth Fairy, they maybe kill a dude and someone looses a body part (more than one, actually). Also: sexing the Tooth Fairy is weird. I would say this book is one half coming of age tale, one half weird fantasy and two thirds LSD trip. And, yes, I know that those things do not add up but that seems to be fitting for this book.
The prose is good, everything is interesting and strangely dark and beautiful. There is a great sense of foreboding throughout which adds a lot without saying much. Very mysterious. I'm seriously not sure how I feel about this at all. My thumb is wavering in the middle. I'm pretty sure I liked it, but...seriously, wtf? Holy cats, I wish someone else would read it and talk to me about it. That is your mission, if you choose to accept it....

Dracula by Bram Stoker

2007-08-21T21:07:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 432 pages
Publisher: Bantam Classics (November 1, 1983)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0553212710
ISBN-13: 978-0553212716
List Price: $4.95
I finished this book on August 21

Okay my lovelies. Here's the thing, I have mentioned about a billion times that I love vampires, but the truth is: I had never read this before. The place where it all started. For shame. Also, I have seen the 1992 film version so many times that I could not stop picturing those actors as the characters. Boo!
Anywho: I'm sure everyone knows the story of this one. However, if you haven't read it and you are going on popular perception of it, you've probably got it wrong. First, there is no love affair between Mina and Sirius Black, I mean Gary Oldman, I mean Count Dracula. The 1992 movie led us to believe that Mina was all "Blood? Yes, please!" But that's not the case. Also, Neo's portrayal of Jonathan Harker in that movie may lead you to believe that Harker is, in fact, a tool. This is not so. In fact, one thing I was continually struck by is how good the people in this book are. They are almost unrealistically kind and understanding. I wanted to hug them. Also, Dracula is not killed by a stake to the heart. I'm just saying...
The book is written in journal entries and newspaper clippings which is very cool. You get to see all the different characters points of view and it's not as cheesy as the switch off chapter narration of some books. I have to say that even though I knew what was going to happen I was still very invested in the melodrama of it all. I can see why this book spawned such an empire. From crazy fan sites, to movies, to being studied in school to delicious breakfast cereal. Mmmm, marshmallow bats...
Though in my head I am definitely cooking up a sexier version of vampires (1/2 Edward from Twilight and 1/2 my boyfriend Trent Reznor perhaps?) I feel a much better vamp enthusiast having read this. And I promise: I will certainly be picking up more classic gothic horror in the near future.

Stardust: film review

2007-08-12T08:32:00.001-07:00

Based on the book Stardust by Neil Gaiman
Directed by Matthew Vaughn
Written by Neil Gaiman and Jane Goldman
Paramount Pictures (2007)
PG-13
128 Minutes
I saw this movie on August 11

Okay, my lovelies. As I mentioned I was thinking about starting to review movies I saw based on books I have read. So, here goes.
As you may remember, I reviewed Stardust here, and gave it the esteemed bee Seal of Approval.
First off: visuals. This movie was extremely good looking. Claire Danes, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Charlie Cox. Remember how I said I hoped Danes looked like she did in Polish Wedding? She did, but better. Not to mention Mark Strong, who plays Septimus (I like the bad boys, sue me). All the settings are very cool, and the magic is represented by sort of jets of light. Awesome. Also, when the star (Danes) shines the effect is very cool. Oh, and the flying pirate ship helmed by Robert DeNiro (do you think his friends call him Bobby?) was well done and DeNiro was funny if a little Baron Munchausen.
Second: the adaptation. Now, when I watch a movie based on a book I loved I try to look at it separately as it's own work rather than tirelessly comparing. The story in the film is changed somewhat from the book, but I thought the changes brought some interesting ideas and very cool action. The narrator of the movie is Ian McKellen (who I sort of wish was my grandfather) and to be honest, I could have used a little more of him. Gaiman's narration in the book was witty, smart and incredibly sharp. I would have liked to hear a little more of that.
Overall, I really liked it. I laughed and smiled and got a little mushy. Definite warm fuzzies. For more info about the film go here. For some reviews go try Rotten Tomatoes and Metacritic. Also, I highly recommend Gaiman's blog. He has talked a lot about the adaptation and various other extremely interesting things. You have to love a man whose nickname is Scary Trousers. Also, we have the animated adaptation of Coraline to look forward to sometime in 2008.
So, that's it for our first movie review! Just another service brought to you by your friendly local booknerd!

Shamelessly asking for money

2007-08-11T10:06:00.000-07:00

Hi kids, it's your favorite booknerd here. It's that time of the year when I have to start going around to people with a sad expression and ask for money to support my yearly charity walk.
My mum and I both have Crohn's disease, which sucks. Each year we do the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation Walk to help raise money. It's actually pretty fun, and this year we are having it at the zoo! Keep in mind that if I don't raise enough money I will get kicked out of my family.
Those of you interested can donate via my goofy CCFA webpage, here. ( i know, i know, worst looking page ever. i wish i could design my own, but they make you use theirs.)
Good things happen to people who donate. Mostly, the good things involve me thanking them obnoxiously, or singing songs about them.
If you live in Buffalo, you should come to the walk on Sept. 8. Check out the page, here. There will be cool auctions, free food and um, I will also be there. If you're lucky I'll get you a t-shirt.
Alright, my lovelies, I'm done begging for handouts now.

Eclipse by Stephanie Meyer

2007-08-09T14:26:00.001-07:00

Publisher: Little, Brown Young Readers (August 7, 2007)
Pages: 628
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0316160202
ISBN-13: 978-0316160209
List Price: $18.99
I finished this book on August 8

Remember when I was wistfully missing Edward and Bella? Well, they are finally here. I picked this up as soon as it came out and read it in just over 24 hours. I was almost as excited for this as I was for Harry Potter. Only, unlike HP I have no one to talk about this with, because I don't know anyone else who's read it. When HP came out my phone was ringing off the hook with people who wanted to discuss and scrutinize. Now, there's no one to discuss my favorite vampire love affair with. So, I'll tell you.
Edward and Bella return in the third book in the Twilight Saga. You may remember I reviewed the first two: Twilight and New Moon. In this volume Bella and Edward are about to graduate from high school and they are trying to figure out what to do in the future: turning Bella-wise. So there are some arguments about that because Edward is reluctant to turn her and she's very stubborn. Also, Bella's werewolf friend Jake, who is painfully in love with her stirs up some trouble between the love birds. Including some kissing!! So, poor Bella has to choose between Jake (who's hot, cause, apparently werewolves are super-heated) and Edward who's so cold. I, however, had never had even one beautiful supernatural creature who was vying for my affections. I'm just saying. Regardless: the love triangle action was very cool. I am totally Team Edward, though I can see what is appealing about Jake (he's so hot!).
Anywho: this book also features lots of cool fighting / vampire war goodness. And, the Big Bad was not who I was expecting, so that was cool too. Another cool part of this book was hearing the background stories on some of the other vamps in Edward's family. I was not expecting to ever feel sorry for Rosalie, but...what do you know, I do.
My predictions for this book were woefully wrong. I had hoped to see two things: Bella turned into a vamp and some sexin'. And you know what? Unsurprisingly, I am 0 for 2. Also, no wedding. I expect the next book will come out and it will be the three days leading up to the wedding and I still get nothing. My my that is frustrating. Though the book wasn't what I was expecting it is always nice to spend time with characters like these. The next one should be out in the Fall of '08 and I super want her to release the book Midnight Sun (Twilight from Edwards point of view) but that may never happen. For those interested, you can read the first chapter of that on Meyer's website. For crazy fan news and other related goodies, visit the fan site, here. For general info, go here. Also, this series gets extra point for having three beautiful covers that will look lovely on my bookshelf in my home library some day.
All in all, it went by too fast and now I'm annoyed to have to wait for the next one. Oh, well, I suppose I can find something to read to tide me over...

Book Divas Author Visit

2007-08-09T14:14:00.001-07:00

So, apparently there is a cool book site I somehow missed out on. It's called Book Divas and it's a book club for YA books. There is a very cool discussion board and a section for teachers and librarians. Even though I do not like to consider myself a "diva" I think I might just have to sign up.
Anywho: the reason I'm telling you this, my lovelies, is that they are having a online author visit on August 13th that I thought you might be interested in. I, for one, love schmoozing with authors, especially when it's free.
The author is Mellisa Marr, and her book is Wicked Lovely. I haven't heard of Mrs. Marr yet, but I am intrigued by the description of the book: fairies, delicious romance scenes? I'm in!
I just thought you might be interested, so you should check it out.
p.s. I'm sure you'll be seeing a review for this book from me, when I can get my hot paws on it.

Oh! I almost forgot! I have been thinking adding reviews of new movies made from books that I have read on the blog. Just a short blurb sort of comparing, cause there are lots of good movies based on books coming up. So, what do you think? Let me know.

Dissecting Stephen King by Heidi Strengell

2007-08-05T11:51:00.001-07:00

Paperback: 320 pages
Publisher: Popular Press 3; New Ed edition (March 15, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0299209741
ISBN-13: 978-0299209742
Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 0.8 inches
List Price: $26.95
I finished this book on August 5

The subtitle to this book is From the Gothic to Literary Naturalism, but I swear that it's much more interesting than it would lead you to believe. Let take the cover, for example. I don't know if you can see from this image but in the picture instead of rib bones what you see inside this dissected chest are typebars from a typewriter. Cool.
Anwho, as you know I am a "constant reader" of (and often claim to be dating) Stephen King. And, because I am a turbo-nerd I am often compelled to read non-fiction books about things in which I am interested. Hence, the SK non-fiction book. I actually took out several from the library to peruse, but this one caught my attention the most.
Inside, author Heidi Strengell dissects the works of SK (did I basically just tell you what you already know from the title? You bet!). She talks about how his work is related to the Gothic tradition, including a drawn out comparison of King's Salem's Lot to popular gothic masterpiece, Dracula (for more info on Gothic books, click here). Then she talks about the myth/fairy tale tradition in King, discussing his "multiverse" and a cool part about how The Dark Tower series, is, among other things, a western, a gothic and an apocalyptic fable. Finally she ends up talking about King using literary naturalism, discussing things like: his use of free will, genetic determinism and the idea of fate.
Strengell herself is mysterious, not having published anything not about SK (more obsessed than me, perhaps?) but if you're interested in reading an essay of hers, then check it out here. So, because she clearly spends too much time thinking about SK she does point out some really interesting stuff and uses tons of examples from a variety of his books. After this I feel I need to go immediately and read Dracula and compare it with Salem's Lot. And eat Count Chocula. (mmm, marshmallow bats) so look forward to that in the near future.
When I was in undergrad I took a course called Philosophy in Literature for which we read several books I hated (who shall remain nameless). And my professor for that class (who shall also remain nameless, but I will note that he habitually wore Chuck Taylors) once went on a tirade about how Stephen King was awful and ruining literature etc. and that he had a magic computer that spit out his books at random according to a formula. Actually, that sounds more like a Stephen King novel premise than reality, doesn't it? Anyway, I remember at the time being very heated by these comments and wanting to make a rebuttal that King's work was popular for a reason. Perhaps I could give Mr. ChuckTaylors a copy of this book. Okay, maybe not. Really, I would only recommend this book to someone who was a big fan and has read a lot of King's work since it relies so heavily on examples. If you are interested, check out King's website.
Happily, even though I have read lots of King, there are still many more of his books out there waiting for me.

Kissing Kate by Lauren Myracle

2007-07-23T18:06:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Hardcover: 176 pages
Publisher: Dutton Juvenile (April 14, 2003)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0525469176
ISBN-13: 978-0525469179
List Price: $7.99
I finished this book on July 23

I'm not sure where I first heard of this book. It may have been from one of the many blogs I read, or from some list of gay teen books or even when I saw the author in Fairport at the Teen Book Festival. I didn't see Ms. Myracle's whole presentation but I thought she seemed funny and cool.
Anyway, because I have read many different YA books about gay boys and not so many about the ladies, well, I figured it was really my duty to do so. You know, to be fair. And cause I love the gays.
So, anyway: Lissa and Kate have been best friends for a long time. The kind of best friends I am always jealous of because the seem to get along so well. Anyway: shit goes sour when Kate gets snookered at a party and the girls kiss. A lot. Then, nearly busted, they stop snogging and Kate ignores Lissa, who slips away. Now they aren't talking, resulting in appropriate sturm und drang.
Did I mention that Lissa's parents are dead and she lives with her well intentioned Uncle who kinda sucks at parenting, leaving her to take care of her younger sister? Cause, you know, she needed more problems. Oh, and she's trying to figure out how to have lucid dreams. Or something.
I felt that the devices used in the story were kind of obvious; and while it's not groundbreaking I am still not mad at it. It's a simple story of a girl trying to figure out her sexuality. Some of the characters were interesting, and it was a quick easy read. I'm not sure this is making or breaking some kid's coming out or anything, but it's a good story nonetheless. And extra points for the cool cover. If you stare at it long enough it looks like the blue hearts are moving. Or maybe that's just me.
This did not touch me the same way that Annie on My Mind did, and that is certainly the most popular lesbian YA book I have heard of. For those interested, I suggest checking that one out as well. Here is a list of other gay themed books, and of course, there are lots more out there. Here's another list geared totally toward gay YA. For good measure here's links to resources for gay teens and local LGBT youth groups.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling

2007-07-22T19:48:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Hardcover
Publisher: Arthur A. Levine Books (July 21, 2007)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0545010225
ISBN-13: 978-0545010221
List Price: $34.99
I finished this book on July 21

Well, my lovelies, it's finally here. I went to midnight madness at our local Borders and let me tell you, it was nuts. There were awesome costumes, my favorites were: a perfect Professor Sprout, a teenage Bellatrix Lestrange, and an amazing Luna Lovegood. There was also a tiny baby dressed up like a house elf: effin cute. Anywho: my boyfriend and I got our books and our complementary posters and ran home to read (guess who is a faster reader, and therefore way cooler? Oh, that's right, this girl). Let me tell you, my dears: we were not disappointed. Hence, the bee seal of approval.
Because you can find spoilers pretty much everwhere on the internet there will probably be a few light ones in here, so beware. However, if you're a diehard I'm sure you've finished by now (unless you're my dad, who will probably still be reading next week).
First off, several of my theories were right, because I am awesome. I liked to see Harry being a bit of a badass in this one. Who calls Voldemort "Tom Riddle"? Only badasses, that's who! Face! Anywho, Ron acts like a baby and then gets over it, and Hermione is a bit more emotional in this book than we've ever seen her which was very cool. Other acts of coolness were committed by: McGonagall, Momma Weasley and of course, Neville, the dark horse.
My favorite part of this book was that we got to see a lot more realistic, 3 dimensional portrayals of some of the characters. Was Dumbledore perfect? Nope, but he was still an amazing wizard and mentor to Harry. Oh, and my boyfriend Snape? Mmm, we are gonna make out (because, you know, he's real).
Overall I was very pleased with this book, though I will admit I'm awfully sad it's over. I will definitely have to reread this one, I'm thinking in the wintertime, when it will taste like comfort food. Anyway: just because it's over doesn't mean I can't yell spells all over the apartment. (the cats especially love this.) Bombarda!
Oooh! Oooh! I almost forgot, there was a bit of swearing in this one! Besides the normal ones like "bloody" (love the Brits) there were a few Bastards, several Arses and a few "effing" which had me cackling at my book. Oh, I love swearing and I love HP and when the two come together it's like a hug from Jesus. Anyway, if you were fighting the Dark Lord you'd be cursing too. I know I would be. And yelling spells. Expelliarmus!
Update: My boyfriend Stephen King has written an amazing review of this book here which you should read. Now. Go do it.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling

2007-07-20T13:41:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Paperback: 652 pages
Publisher: Scholastic Paperbacks (July 25, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0439785960
ISBN-13: 978-0439785969
List Price: $9.99

Okay, boys and girls. I have finished this re-reading this just in time to get my hot little nerdy hands onto the seventh and final in the Harry Potter series. The new book comes out tonight at midnight and I will be there with a big orange wristband and bells on.
I'm pretty sure that anyone who plans of ever reading HP knows what happens in this book and those who haven't have had things spoiled by them for sure. However: here is your spoiler warning! In this book HP and the gang are trying to get through a year where they don't battle Voldemort. Actually, they succeed, but fighting his death eaters is just as bad it turns out. Highlights of the book: I am happy to see Ginny and Harry snogging. Hopefully Ron and Hermione next? I am happy Luna made it through the fight. I like her, and I was worried that her secondary character nature might make her a target for J.K. Rowling's Hand of Doom. One more book to go, Luna, hang on! Total upsetting bummers. Um, gee, I dunno my boyfriend Snape killing Dumbledore? That's a pretty huge bummer. I definitely cried the first time I read it and almost became teary again this time during the funeral scene.
The coolest thing about this book is learning more about Voldemort's past. Also, Horcruxes are a very cool idea and completely badass. I also really liked getting to hang out with Dumbledore in this book. It was nice, and cozy, and I wish Dumbledore was my grandfather. Also, points to Fleur for still wanting to marry Bill even though his face is effed up. And p.s. I am totally psyched by the romance between Tonks and Lupin.
So, anyway: here are some of my theories, which are completely unsubstantiated and soon to be proven wrong. 1. Dumbledore really is dead 2. Snape is good. Those are basically the big ones. I have based my life on Snape being good, and will be seriously annoyed if this is not the case. Though, in all honesty, I would probably still make out with Alan Rickman if given the opportunity. I also think that Sirius might come back from the mystery grave. Here's why: that was the most bullshit death ever! Ooh, I got hit by a hex and stumbled into an archway of death. Balls! I say boo to it, and I hope he resurfaces. Also, who is going to be head of Gryffindor house now? I say maybe...Hagrid? I dunno.
So it's only a few hours away and I'm avoiding anyplace on the interweb that might lead me to a spoiler. So, if you are doing the same I send you to this completely safe place to take a fun sorting quiz (cause we can't all be cool enough to have a sorting hat at home like yours truly). Go here and see where you belong. The quiz said I was a Ravenclaw, which I buy. I like to think I'm smart but also acknowledge that I'm not as tough as maybe I should be. Okay, I'm off to nap in preparation for the late night of reading I will be doing. (p.s. I can't stop yelling spells in British accents) Sectusempre!

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling

2007-07-17T16:37:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Paperback: 870 pages
Publisher: Scholastic Paperbacks (August 10, 2004)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0439358078
ISBN-13: 978-0439358071
List Price: $9.99
I finished this book on July 16

Okay, as you may have guessed I am a huge Harry Potter fan. And, since the new book is coming out in 4 days I had decided to refresh my memory of the 5th and 6th books. Of course I waited too long and now I'm spending lots of time reading HP to get it done before midnight madness on Friday. My favorite thing to do lately since re-reading these is shouting spells at people. Stupify! Reducto!
Anyway, firstly I will confess that number 5 (OOTP) was not my favorite in the series. There is a lot of teenage brooding (Harry) and actually, a bit of adult brooding as well (Sirius) but rereading it after just seeing the new movie did bring some things back into light for me.
In this book Harry and the forces of good (AKA The Order of the Phoenix) battle the forces of bad (AKA Voldemort and friends) by staying in a dank house, getting lots of detentions and trying to pass exams. Worst synopsis ever? You bet! Anyway: I really liked reading about the Dumbledore's Army classes and hearing the Prophesy again. Also, hearing the Prophesy again made me revise a few of my theories about the upcoming last book (which I will share with you in my next review). Did you remember that the prophesy could have been about Neville? I totally forgot that!
We also get to hear a lot more about Dumbledore and his plans and reasoning for things, which I dig. He gets a bit sentimental in that scene, actually (Aww, someone lurves Harry.) However, one of my favorites dies in this book which pisses me off (also, they effed that bit up in the film).
I liked the new movie version of this a lot, mostly because it cut out a lot of the angsty whining of the kids and added a little more action. Though, I must say, Mr. Daniel Radcliff is looking a bit old to be the 15 year old wizard he is portraying. He looks like maybe we could date in real life. Not that I'm interested of course, cause, you know... I like the old men. So, yeah, that's right, I have my heart set on Snape. Or, as I like to call him, Alan Rickman, my boyfriend. Cause he's a kickass legilimens. Dig it.
If you haven't read the books I highly suggest doing so. Unless of course...you hate fun! If you have read the books and have questions try reading some Harry Potter wikis. Yeah, that's right, there are more than one. Good ones are here, and here. If you want to read college thesis level examinations and conspiracy theories about Harry Potter than go to this site whose very name used to be a spoiler. Or enjoy MuggleNet. If you are into board games I highly recommend Harry Potter Scene-It.
And, in case you guys labored under the delusion that I am anything other than a completely flaming dorky power nerd: please enjoy a picture of me in the sorting hat. Gryffindor!

The Secretary of Dreams by Stephen King illustrated by Glenn Chadbourne

2007-07-09T15:24:00.000-07:00

Hardcover: 290 pages
Publisher: Cemetery Dance Publications (October 30, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1587671409
ISBN-13: 978-1587671401
List Price: $75.00
I finished this book July 7th

Okay, friends and neighbors, you all know I'm a Stephen King "constant reader". Also, you know I dig on the graphic novels and comics. So, imagine my happiness last fall when I heard I could purchase some of SK's short stories newly illustrated. I hinted that I wanted this gift for Christmas (by hint I mean I sent the link to the Amazon page and where to buy it to my boyfriend via e-mail. cause I'm stealthy like that.) and his parents bought it for me. However, it was on this crazy backorder or something and I only just got it now. Let me tell you this, my lovlies, it is sexy! It's big and hard bound and came with this faux leather case deal. Fancy.
So, the actual stories are all ones I've read before, of course. I was impressed that they were some of his lesser known ones. The first is called Home Delivery and is actually from a collection called Book of the Dead which is all zombie stories from different authors. There are 6 short stories in all, 3 are just illustrated about every other page and the others are written as though they are comic books. So, it's a really cool idea. However, I'm not in love with the illustrator's work, to be honest. It's gory, to be certain, but it's all black and white sort of scratchy pen lines to me, and I didn't love it. Apparently Glenn (with 2 n's, why?) is an illustrator from Maine (shock!) and you can read an interview with him here. He has already signed on for volume two and is hard at work. These are put out by Cemetery Dance who is also putting out the Dark Tower Series as comic books (which, you know, I want super bad too).
Honestly, I will probably get the second volume too, though I'm not a huge fan of the art. Mostly because Stephen King is my boyfriend (I think you should know that when I say that I'm saying it in the Frau Blücher voice from Young Frankenstein) Maybe the artwork will grow on me. I guess I was expecting some super creepy art like from Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. Let's not pretend that stuff didn't scare the crap out of you when you were little (or last night, you wuss!). See creepy images, here, here and here. Hell's bells, creepy stuff, people.

The Nymphos of Rocky Flats by Mario Acevedo

2007-07-08T10:19:00.000-07:00

Paperback: 368 pages
Publisher: Rayo (March 14, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0060833262
ISBN-13: 978-0060833268
List Price: $13.95
I finished this book on July 7th

Okay, so right now you're shaking your heads. Another vampire sex romp? I know, I know. Here's the thing for a book with such a sensational title there is no sex in this book. Honest. There is some brief talk about it, but, in the end: no love. Weak.
The plot: Felix was a soldier in Iraq and he accidentally killed some civilians. Then an Iraqi dude turned him into a vampire. Seriously. So, now he's a private detective vamp who walks in the sun (sunscreen, ugh) and doesn't drink human blood (Oh! The Guilt! Double Ugh!) I must admit I'm a little sick of how every vampire in every book doesn't drink from people. Come on! That's what we're here for! You're not scary if I don't think you might attack me for my delicious plasma at any moment.
So anyway, Mr. Not Spooky Pants slaps on some sunscreen and tried to figure out why some broads at this military base have come down with nymphomania. Hehe. Eventually of course, he does figure it out, but the ending is not what you're thinking. Trust me.
This reminds me vaguely both of the Jack Flemming books and the Dresden Files books. I would recommend this book for vampire lovers like me, but the casual vampire reader may not need to go here. It's not the best example of the genre ever. The pros: moderately funny. Kick ass title/cover. Reasonably cool main character. The cons: did I mention the book is about nymphos and has no sex scenes? Mr. Acevedo you tease.
Apparently this is the first in a series. You can check it out, here. Also Mr. Acevedo writes a blog with another vampire writer, here.
This makes me miss my favorite animal drinking vamp: Edward. When oh when is Eclipse coming out (August 7)?

Photos

2007-07-04T09:33:00.000-07:00

Hello my lovelies! I'm back from Florida and you can expect more books to be posted on a more regular basis now.
Here's the thing, I'm not one of those people who's gonna try to make you look at pictures of my vacation for hours, or my awesome amateur photography (but if you're interested, I do have a flickr, and you can check it out here also, I am awesome and so are my pictures). Having said that in Florida and we did Disney and Universal. I have to say I think Universal is cooler, and they have something I thought you'd enjoy, so I brought you back some pics.
That's right, Universal has a whole section dedicated to Dr. Seuss! I thought you'd enjoy seeing some pics of the Lorax since I have reviewed it on this site. And yes, he looks even more like Wilfred Brimley in person. The third pic is the Once-ler's House, and you can actually walk through the garden of Truffula Trees and stuff. Cool! Well, anywho: enjoy!

Angus, Thongs, and Full Frontal Snogging by Louise Rennison

2007-07-02T13:19:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Young Adult
Paperback: 256 pages
Publisher: HarperTeen (January 21, 2003)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0060521848
ISBN-13: 978-0060521844
List Price: $6.99
I finished this book on June 30

When I was student teaching in a middle school this book was all the rage with the 8th grade girlies. So it came to me highly recommended as sort of a teen Bridget Jones. I must confess that while I see the fun in books like Bridget, I am not usually into such feminine fare. However, the confessions of 14 year old Georgia Nicolson are silly and fun. Also, quite innocent for such goofy and racy titles.
Basically, we're looking at diary style entries detailing Georgia, her cat, and Robbie: the Sex God (hehe) The British slang is funny and is explained with a little glossary in the back of the book. For your own amusement you can look up slang here. Even more bizarre is the Cockney Rhyming Slang I came across while researching, seriously: huh? P.S. Snogging = kissing, and really, it's an extremely satisfying word to say. Mmm...snogging....
Oh, sorry...anywho: Georgia is fun and she has a crazy cat who harasses people and eats things (but, regrettably, does not talk). Any reluctant reader teen girl would love these books. For me it was a plane ride to Florida read that was quick and funny and simple.
Apparently there are a thousand (or, you know, six) of these books out. Evidently they have some different titles here as opposed to the UK (or I'm making that up, but I definitely saw some weirdness with the titles on US sites vs. UK) my top two favorite titles are: Startled by His Furry Shorts (really, who isn't startled by that?) and Away Laughing on a Fast Camel (watch out, they spit!)
In addition: because every remotely popular thing is made into a movie, this book will be made into a movie sometime in the future. Currently the IMDB page isn't giving me much to go on. I'm hoping they do it justice, and that they don't cast sexy 20 somethings to play the awkward teens, because that annoys me. (Alexis Bledel in both Sin City and The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants in the same year, anyone?)
I'm super tempted to end this with some horribly cliched British phrase, but I won't. I want you to know I respect you, people, and I'm restraining myself with all my might. Cheerio. Dammit! That one slipped out.

a gift to you

2007-06-21T12:19:00.000-07:00

It's my birthday (yes, I get more excited about my birthday than most 12 year olds) but I thought I'd give you all a fun gift. Go check out this website: http://bookinscriptions.com/
It's a site dedicated to fun and interesting book inscriptions. I love to get and give books as gifts. Though I'm not usually big on writing in books, these are fun. Enjoy!

A Midsummer Night's Dream by William Shakespeare

2007-06-21T11:26:00.000-07:00

Mass Market Paperback: 240 pages
Publisher: Signet Classics (May 1, 1998)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0451526961
ISBN-13: 978-0451526960
List Price: $4.95
I finished this book on June 21

Hehe. This makes me chuckle. It's one of my favorite Shakespeare plays. I couldn't find a good cover image (the book I have has a pattern of a fairy and dude with a donkey head. it's very 70's) so I ganked this image from somewhere. I dig it because Titania has Farrah Fawcett hair. I totally wish my hair floated around me like that, though I'm sure it would get cumbersome after a while.
Okay, so this is the last book of the challenge, and I've finished it on the last day, which is, as I mentioned: my birthday. And this play is a little birthday treat. I had to read it by myself though: I tried to get my boyfriend to read this out loud with me, but he wouldn't do it (lame!). Though I'm sure most of you have read it, my lovelies, here's my snarky synopsis. So four young people with mixed up love lives venture into the forest and get hassled by fairies. Said fairies work their magic and mess up their love lives even more and of course, shenanigans ensue. Also there are some goofy actors and one of them gets his head turned into a donkey. That reminds me of some of the transformations in Strange Happenings, how about you?
I love everything about this story, it's fun and low on the tragedy (unlike all the Shakespeare we had to read in school). Speaking of school: if you feel the need to over analyze this please feel free to do so here.
Reading this makes me want to watch the movie again. I like the 1999 version with just about every famous person ever in it. I highly recommend it, everyone is very good looking and shimmery. I remember seeing this play performed live when I was a youngster at Shakespeare in the Park here in Buffalo. Between getting bit by mosquitoes it was super enjoyable. For those of you who have not enjoyed it I say: to the theatre (or netflix) with you! or, you know...read it...possibly with friends. Extra points to those who use fun voices/accents.

Strange Happenings by Avi

2007-06-21T08:26:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Hardcover: 160 pages
Publisher: Harcourt Children's Books (May 1, 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0152057900
ISBN-13: 978-0152057909
List Price: $15.00
I finished this book on June 20

The subtitle of this book is Five tales of Transformation and that's exactly what it is. This was the last book for the challenge besides the extra credit book (which I'll be finishing later today) and it was a quick fun read.
When I was a little Bee I used to hate going to school and I would always wish I was my cat, Ivy, so I wouldn't have to go. Ivy got to sit at home in sunbeams all day and do whatever she wanted and I had to go to lame-ass school and do math (to this day math makes me ill). As you can guess, I never turned into a cat, but Tom did, in one of the stories in this book. Tom finds out, undoubtedly as I would have, that being a cat is kinda lame and he wants to switch back. Trouble is the former boy then cat now inhabiting Tom's human body does not want to switch back. Super weak! It just goes to show you kids, don't trust talking stray cats. Oh, who am I kidding? We all know I love talking animals.
I'm not sure what my favorite story in the book is, but I think the one titled "Curious" is sticking to me the most. It's about a kid who's very curious and sets out to find the truth about the town baseball mascot. And um, bad stuff ensues. Yikes. I think this one is too creepy for some younglings (by that I mean too scary for me). Did I mention that I'm afraid of mascots of any kind? Once a guy dressed up like a big stupid pink ice cream cone put his arm around me and I nearly punched his big pink gut. See, all I'm saying is, it could be a killer under there. Or Cher. I'm just saying, what's Cher been doing lately?
Anywho: this was a fun short one of stories that seemed somewhat familiar to me, like I'd heard them around a campfire before, or something. In fact, I think that would be the perfect place to hear them. Avi, of course, has written a gajillion books (48,317 results, Amazon? Really?) and this one probably just slipped out one morning while he ate his frosted flakes. But it was cool and worth a read, not to mention boasting a cool cover image. The last thing I read where people turned into other things was The Metamorphosis. Somehow, I think you won't find it hard to believe that this was a little tastier than Kafka.

American Gods by Neil Gaiman

2007-06-18T18:41:00.000-07:00

Mass Market Paperback: 624 pages
Publisher: HarperTorch (April 30, 2002)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0380789035
ISBN-13: 978-0380789030
List Price: $7.99
I finished this book on June 18

Okay my lovelies, I just returned this evening from Florida trip number one. This week will be busy (finishing the challenge plus celebrating my birthday and my new niece) and then I will be leaving for more Florida nonsense on the 24th. My personal shenanigans aside, I still found time to finish this book (feels like I have been reading it forever, though). American Gods fills my mythology spot in the challenge, which is quickly drawing to a close.
So, imagine that Gods from just about every different belief system in the world are hanging out in America. Now imagine if they were going to war. Yeah - ouch. Now imagine if you find yourself in the middle like Shadow, our downtrodden hero. Shadow is just about to get out of jail when he finds out that he's getting out early because (insert The Price Is Right loosing noise here) his wife died. Worse yet: she died while she was giving someone else road head (seriously? who does that?! Have people not read Thinner? Jesus Christmas!) Anywho: an understandably despondent Shadow takes a job with a mysterious and shady character named Mr. Wednesday. Is he a god? Yes sir. Does he draw Shadow into a web of intrigue that opens Shadow's eyes to various things? Indeed. Also, Shadow's dead slut wife stays dead but hangs around occasionally lending a (rotting) hand and spitting out maggots. Awesome.
For me, this story was somehow simple and super involved at the same time. There was a lot of characters coming back being more important than you thought originally which I appreciate. I always like when things you learned about before become nice and significant later on. This book also made me wish that I knew more about various mythologies, so you can look forward to me reading some more myths in the future. Check out the info about the book and all the different gods involved. I also liked a lot of the characters - there were endearing crotchety old gods and cool ladies (did I mention that a guy got swallowed by a certain god's lady-parts? yikes stripes!). I also really liked Shadow. He was a very realistic guy in a totally crazy situation and I have a big crush on him -but not as big as the crush I have on Mr. Gaiman. Coincidentally - I recommend reading his blog, because it's super enjoyable.

bee's random ramblings

2007-06-12T17:50:00.000-07:00

So, my astute lovelies, you've probably noticed that this post isn't a book review. And you'd be right. It's a love note from me to tell you that I will be out of town a lot during the rest of the month. I'm going on two separate trips to Florida, and will have only sporadic internet access.
I mention this because I like to think you'll miss me. The real moral of the story is that I won't be on my meebo chat so if have something really important to say you can e-mail me (check out my profile for the address).
In other news: I have been asked several times lately how I choose what to read next. Mostly, I choose based on two things: recommendations from friends/colleagues, or book reviews. I read lots and lots of book reviews at my job. Anywho: up till now I have collected titles of books I wanted to read on little post it notes (have I mentioned that I'm a school supply junkie? check out this cryptic quiz of movies made out of office supplies. it's good times.) Because the post it's have been taking over my life I have begun to make an actual list that I won't loose. You can peek at it here, please note that it's just a random listing of some of the post its I've collected with titles i want to check out. Also note that I hate capitalizing things. I'm not sorry. Feel free to give me more suggestions, I'm always looking.
Okay, one last thing to share with you: I totally stalk where people come from to get to my site and what search terms lead people here. Some of them are hysterical and I will now share them for your amusement.

schmoozing geek
what happens in the champagne room (no sex, that's what, son!)
gay bum sex (heehee! I can't imagine why!)
how to get an awesome ponytail (I'm number 2 - that cracks my shit up!)
werewolf sex room (okay, that's too weird even for me)
foxy librarian (that's me!)
naughty greek gods
homosexual priests
inappropriate behavior

There are actually tons of ones about these two things: gay porn and man ponytails/80s hair.
So, if you've come here accidentally while looking for porn please stick around even though there is no boobage or naked men (but you know, there are some books about gay sex) If you've come here trying to find how to have an awesome 80's man-shag maybe, um, you should reconsider that look. Just sayin' So, lovely reader...how did you get here? (perv)
The moral of this post: I'll be on vacation but I promise I'll be reading a lot (finishing up my challenge books!) and I'll post when I can! p.s. pretend like you miss me!

Abhorsen by Garth Nix

2007-06-06T20:56:00.000-07:00

Audio Cassette
Publisher: Listening Library (January 2006)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0807205605
ISBN-13: 978-0807205600
List Price: $25.00
I finished listening to this audio book on June 6

That's right, kids! Two seals of approval in a row! We're on a streak! (apparently we are also on an exclamation point streak!! sorry, i'll calm down).
Okay, so, as you may have guessed this is the third (and, regrettably final) installment in the Abhorsen Trilogy. Of course, we remember Sabriel and Lirael. Well, this one takes all the best fun parts from these books and rolls it up into a great big ball of charter magic shenanigans
So, here's the rub: the big bad in this book is The Big Bad (not to be confused with strongbad) meaning he's called The Destroyer and he means to destroy. He's been bound up in some metal circles for about a gajillion years and he's piiissed (that's only read properly if you kinda sing it, you know what I mean). So, Lirael and Sam have to stop it with the help of my favorite character ever: The Disreputable Dog. Craziness and badassery ensue. Big time. This book had some really good parts and I had chills more than once.
Also, you may remember in the Lirael post I wrote that I had some requirements for this book. One: I wanted to find out more about the Disreputable Dog *bing* Done! I'm not gonna tell you, but I will say that I giggling and clapping in my car like a total nutcase. Two: I wanted Sam to stop being such a girly man. Check! He totally stopped the whining which was a total plus. Three: I wanted Lirael to kiss someone, anyone (besides the Dog who licks her constantly). You can't hear it but I'm making the Taboo buzzer noise. No kisses for Lirael, but as Eddie from Rocky Horror tells us two outta three ain't bad. What? Did I just mention Rocky Horror, which also stars my favorite audio book reader, Tim Curry? Why yes, yes I did. I know you're sick of hearing it, but I'm not sorry. I love this man's voice.
Apparently there is a collection of short stories from Mr. Nix titled Across the Wall: Tales of the Abhorsen and Other Stories. According to the review here it only contains one story relating to this series, but I would still read it.
Anyway, I loved this series, there is such cool magic going on and the female characters are strong and interesting. I'm sort of surprised that this series isn't more popular. I definitely recommend it. Also, if you read these and like them I suggest the Sevenwaters Trilogy. This is one of my favorite fantasies with amazing female characters, one of which my my cat is named after. p.s. I wish my cats could talk, though I doubt they have anything as interesting to say as the Disreputable Dog or Mogget.

The Tale of Despereaux by Kate DiCamillo

2007-06-04T10:36:00.000-07:00

Reading level: Ages 9-12
Hardcover: 272 pages
Publisher: Candlewick; Library Binding edition (August 25, 2003)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0763617229
ISBN-13: 978-0763617226
List Price: $17.99
I finished this book on June 3

My stars, I loved this! I haven't doled out the seal of approval in a while, so this is momentous. I was just waiting for something like this to come along. This is another one of those that I picked up and read in one sitting before bed. It was like a sweet and satisfying cup of tea with cookies (I'm very into cookies). The subtitle of this book is Being the Story of a Mouse, a Princess, Some Soup, and a Spool of Thread which I love. And this cuteness has also won a Newbery Medal, which made me assume that it would be sad and possibly feature the gratutious death of one or more characters (possibly a child) but, awesomely, it was not like that at all. It was cute and sweet.
See, Despereaux is a tiny mouse, really tiny, with these great big ears, who lives in a castle. He doesn't want to be like other mice, he's not interested in hunting for crumbs, or scurrying, or even nibbling paper. In fact, he is much more inclined to read the romantic tales in the library than to eat them. So, of course, I want to snorgle Despereaux, despite the fact that he's a fictional mouse. Also, I love talking animals. But that's the problem, Despereaux talks to the beautiful Princess Pea, worse, he falls in love with her. This sets all the other little meeces' knickers into a twist and they banish tiny Despereaux to the dungeon to be eaten by rats (oh no!) From there, the story splits off and introduces us to a few different characters who all play a part in Despereaux's tale.
My favorite scene is where Despereaux is trying to tell the king something and he won't listen. The king basically puts his hands over his head and says "Nah nah, I can't hear you..." like a child, which I found hilarious. Not to mention that he has outlawed soup and rats, which, you know...makes perfect sense and is not at all crazy.
Another great part of the story is DiCamillo's voice. She talks to the reader, and even encourages the reader to go look up words, which I think is fantastic (I will not tell a lie, my dears, I had to look up a word). There are also sweet illustrations of the tiny mouse, the mean rats and the beautiful Princess Pea done by Timothy Ering. Anywho, the book was great, and it's one of mine for the challenge. I will definitely be reading more of Ms. Camillo's work in the future.

The Subtle Knife by Phillip Pullman

2007-06-03T13:06:00.000-07:00

Hardcover: 352 pages
Publisher: Knopf Books for Young Readers (July 22, 1997)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0679879250
ISBN-13: 978-0679879251
List Price: $13.60
I finished this book on June 3

Okay, so this one is the second in the His Dark Materials trilogy. I read the first book last spring when I was in my young adult books class. I have been waiting to read the others for a while now and I finally had time. Not to mention, they count towards the challenge.
The first book (soon to be a movie staring the hungry Nicole Kidman) centers mostly on Lyra, a little girl in a world that both different and similar than ours. In Lyra's world everyone has a Daemon, who is basically an animal version of their soul. The daemon's of children change to whatever animal shape they want but when a child becomes an adult the daemon takes on a fixed form. At the movie's website you can take a quiz and get your own daemon. Mine is a badass wolf, (fear him!) by clicking you can also see what yours might be (and if you do, tell me in the comments!)
In this book there is a lot more going on than just Lyra's exploits. We meet a boy named Will who is from our world, and many other characters. My favorite part of this book is all the different plots going on and the different motivations of all the different characters. Reading I was struck by how real and human so many of the characters felt to me. There is, however, an injury of a character that made me mighty angry and which reminded me of a similar injury in another book which also steamed me up. (hint: dad a chum, dad a chee, I can't help but bring up Stephen King all the time, I'm rubbish.)
This trilogy has a lot going on in the allegory department. Toward the end of this book many things became clear to me and I'm very excited to jump into the next one. The book focuses on, to name a few: sin, evolution, the Fall, and many other religious ideas. I'm expecting there to be an all out war with the heavens in the next book and I'm not thinking I'll be disappointed.
There's about a million sites online dedicated to this series, but here's what I suggest: for character and plot info as well as analysis check out spark notes and the wikipedia article. Also check out the Random House page and this page which has a whole chat community.